Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Reality Bites

Want to know my opinion of the REAL State of the Union? Read all about it HERE .

Walking the Line

[Starting Over-part 2]

Looking back I realize that baby probably saved my life. Once I faced the reality of my situation, I knew I had to quit smoking (well the pot anyway) drinking, and the partying. It wasn't easy. But there was a child and I had to do what I had to do.
Being a person with an addictive personalyity I needed a fix. Bad. It was then I discovered the warmth, and comfort of food. Thus began my lifetime love affair. Food and I. Oh what great lovers we were/are. Food is my crutch. There's so much and it's all sooooo good! So many varities, so many tastes. Of all life's drugs it's the most addictive. And the hardest to fight. You can live without cigarettes. You can live without pot, speed, coke, crack, even meth. You can live without alcohol. You cannot live without food. Everyday you need the very thing your addicted to, just to survive you need food. The line between nourishment and overindulgence is so thin, it's almost invisible. And almost impossible to walk. If I had a dollar for everytime I slipped and fell, I'd be rich. No joke. Rich.
On the positive side, once I achieved 'plump' very few people hated me.
There have been short periods of time in my adult life where I've been, well, attractive. But somehow, I always fell back into the comfot zone. Back to the food-in-mouth disease. My addiction has ruled my life for close to 25 years now. It's cost me more than you can imagine. Every time I'd tried to figth this battle I've lost.
Today, I turned 49. With much introspection, I'm asking myself "how did I get here". I'm too young to look this way. I'm too young to be willing to settle for looking frumpy and middle aged. I'm too young to give up on love and life. I've allowed this addiction and my fear of who I am to sabotage my life far too long. So, once again I'm going to screw up my courage and put my foot on that nearly invisible line. This time, I'm gonna make it. I have to. Anything less is to give up completely. This time next year I am determined to be a different woman. God help me this time I mean to make it. With a little help from my friends and a lot of help from God. It may well be the hardest thing I've ever done, but I can't 'not' try. I can do this, can't I?

Starting Over

Today is my birthday. I'm 49. In a way, I guess you'd say I'm in the middle of my life.
Have you ever stopped in the middle of something and ask yourself, "How did I get here,"?
I've been doing that a lot lately. Wondering how did I let my life come to this. As a young girl I dreamed of being a dancer. Sadly I had no talent for dancing. Sing, I can do. Like an angel. Or so I've been told. But dance? No. I don't have two left feet. My whole body is left. The rhythm in my mind simply won't translate to my feet. So, I moved on, left that dream lying among the scattered pages of the scrapbook of my life.
I had other dreams to pursue. Dreams of love. Of passion. I've spent most of my life chasing those dreams. You might think by now I would have at least caught the tailwind of one or two. But no, it seems every time I ever came close, the scared little girl inside did something to sabotage the budding dream. "For every time someone has done me wrong there are probably five times I did it to myself." ( Brian)
Brian has an excellent post on sabotage. Apparently he, like myself, is an old hand at doing himself in. Being my own worst enemy is a talent I have down pat. I've used every means known to man. Drugs, alcohol, guilt, food, you name it I can probably tell you how I've used it to screw something up.
I had a therapist tell me once I do this because deep inside I don't think I deserve to be happy. This is most likely true. Of all my memories from my childhood, the one that stands out is the memory of my sister telling me over and over that I was a spoiled brat that everybody loved just because I was pretty. I hated being pretty. I hated that the person I loved and wanted to be my friend couldn't stand me. It didn't matter that other people made a big deal over me. The only person that mattered ignored me. I knew that meant I had to be bad. I didn't deserve all the attention. Those people didn't really care about "ME". All they cared about was that cute little girl with blue eyes and blond curls.
As a teenager I can remember hearing other girls talk about me behind my back. Teenagers can say the most hateful things. They hated me.
By college I found a way to handle the hurt. Drugs. When your stoned you don't feel the pain. It's amazing the feeling you get from coke. No not cola. Of course cola was good, with a little rum. But I preferred tequila. Straight with lemon thank you. Give me a tequila sunrise and I'd dance all night. Well, I'd try. Until I passed out. Wow, at last I was dancing. And people liked it too.
I look back and I wonder how in the world did I manage to never get myself in a situation where I got raped or worse. I guess there was always someone around to take care of me. I was lucky that way. Unfortunately the guys who wanted to take care or me weren't the guys I wanted. Oh no. I wanted the bad boys. Of course it was inevitable that sooner or later my luck would run out. I didn't get raped, but when your drunk, and stoned, things can happen. I was young, naive, and careless. Reality came knocking on my door when I realized I was three months pregnant and had no idea where my baby's daddy was. Oh I knew WHO he was, just not where he'd gone to. Don't get me wrong. I didn't sleep around. But one night, one mistake and my life was forever changed.
to be continued....

Monday, January 30, 2006

Mad as Hell

A US grand jury in Guam opened an investigation of controversial lobbyist Jack Abramoff more than two years ago, but President Bush removed the supervising federal prosecutor, and the probe ended soon after.
The previously undisclosed Guam inquiry is separate from a federal grand jury in the District of Columbia that is investigating allegations that Abramoff bilked Indian tribes out of millions of dollars.
The chief prosecutor, US Attorney Frederick A. Black, who had launched the investigation, was demoted. A White House news release announced that Bush was replacing Black.

The timing caught some by surprise. Despite his officially temporary status as the acting US attorney, Black had held the assignment for more than a decade.*

Now, this...
The investigation into Jack Abramoff, the disgraced Republican lobbyist, took a provocative new turn Thursday when the Justice Department said the chief prosecutor in the inquiry would step down next week because he had been nominated to a federal judgeship by President Bush.
The prosecutor, Noel Hillman, is chief of the department’s Office of Public Integrity, and the move ends his involvement in an investigation that has reached into the administration as well as into the top ranks of the Republican leadership on Capitol Hill.

How damned convenient.
How can President Bush remove Abramoff’s prosecutor twice and get away with it?

The White House dismissed the calls for a special prosecutor.
"It’s nothing but pure politics," said Scott McClellan, the White House secretary.

Well for once I agree with Mr McClelland. This is pure politics and a clear case of covering your own (and your party's) ass.

I'm mad as hell. Do I need to explain this? Why isn’t this a major scandal that every politician and news network is talking about? This is headline news, or it SHOULD be. Yet the main stream media ( you know the one 'some' people keep calling the liberal biased media) buries it?
Why isn't Bill O'Reilly all over this? Why isn't Chris Matthews playing REAL Hardball?
Instead of worrying about somebody stealing Christmas why isn't John Gibson talking about who's stealing our democracy?

Why am I writing about it here? Because I think it's darned time every single American wake up and smell the roses.
YOU matter. YOU count. Pay attention. It's YOUR country too. Dagnabit, GET INVOLVED!

Do me a favor all you Bush supporters. In the next election. Please just say no.
Or stay home.

* Thanks to Karena for bringing this to MY attention.

Sunday, January 29, 2006


Something wonderful and amazing is happening to me. I'm not sure I'm ready for it, but here it is. I'm not ready to share the details just yet. I'm taking tiny baby steps. Who knows where they'll lead or when I'll get there. But every journey begins with one small step.
Sometimes miracles happen.

Saturday, January 28, 2006

The Long Black Train

Josh Turner

There's a long black train comin' down the line,
Feeding off the souls that are lost and cryin'.
Rails of sin, only evil remains.
Watch out, brother, for that long black train.
Look to the heaven's, you can look to the sky.
You can find redemption staring back into your eyes.
There is protection and there's peace the same:
Burnin' your ticket for that long black train.
'Cause there's victory in the Lord,
I say.Victory in the Lord.
Cling to the Father and his Holy name,
And don't go ridin' on that long black train.

There's an engineer on that long black train,
Makin' you wonder if the ride is worth the pain.
He's just a-waitin' on your heart to say:
"Let me ride on that long black train."

But you know there's victory in the Lord,
I say.Victory in the Lord.
Cling to the Father and his Holy name,
And don't go ridin' on that long black train.

Well, I can hear the whistle from a mile away.
It sounds so good but I must stay away.
That train is a beauty makin' everybody stare,
But its only destination is the middle of nowhere.
But you know there's victory in the Lord,
I say.Victory in the Lord.
Cling to the Father and his Holy name,
And don't go ridin' on that long black train.

I said cling to the Father and his Holy name,
And don't go ridin' on that long black train.
Yeah, watch out brother for that long black train.
That devil's drivin' that long black train.

See the video.."http://www.umgnashville.com/player.aspx?fid=290&pgid=6&hid=13&ftyp=3

Friday, January 27, 2006

Some Gave All...

Twenty years ago,(January 28,1986) space shuttle Challenger blew apart into jets of fire and plumes of smoke, a terrifying sight witnessed by the families of the seven astronauts and by those who came to watch the historic launch of the first teacher in space.

I recall with aching clarity exactly where I was on that cold January morning. Living in Fairbanks, Alaska, working as a school crossing guard. It was a cold clear morning, the temperature was in the negatives, my son Robby, who was only 2 at the time, lay asleep in the back seat of our station wagon (you know, the car families drove before mini vans took over). The car was running, so it would stay warm inside, I listened to the radio as I waited for each group of kids to come along. I remember the countdown, although to be honest I wasn't really paying that much attention. It wasn't a big deal in the overall scheme of my life.
I remember the chill that ran down my spine when the announcer said, "Oh dear God!". Then there was this long minute of silence, when he spoke again there was a tremble in his voice. It was clear he was having a hard time maintaining his composure. It was heartbreaking. I had to get out to help a few late stragglers cross, I remember feeling weak, shaking. Their bright, happy little faces had no idea the tragedy that had just befallen our nation. Our world.
As I look back I realize it wasn't the event itself that shook me so much as it was the feeling of being an unseeing witness to death. One moment they were there, bright, shining with hope, and excitement, the symbol of exploration and adventure. The next they were gone.

"It was one of those defining moments in your life that you will always remember," said U.S. Sen. Bill Nelson, D-Fla., who had flown on the shuttle mission preceding Challenger. "Because in 1986, the space shuttle was the symbol of technological prowess of the United States and all the sudden it's destroyed in front of everybody's eyes."

On board that morning was the first civilian in space. How appropriate that it should be a school teacher. A builder and shaper of young minds. Christa McAuliffe joined flight commander Dick Scobee, pilot Mike Smith and astronauts Ellison Onizuka, Judy Resnik, Ron McNair and Greg Jarvis.

Today I take my hat off to the crew of the Challenger, to all those who have gone before them and who have come after. It is through their sacrifice that we may one day see human life expand from our little planet into the universe and beyond. They too served their country. They too gave their all.

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Reality -v- Spin

I know we don't like to talk politics here at BB. Well sorry, but this is important. To me it is vital. So take a few minutes out of your busy lives and read. It won't hurt. You don't have to comment. Just read it and think about it. A lot.
Soon the President will deliver his annual 'State of the Union' speech. As gut wrenchingly boring as it will be we all need to take the time to watch and listen. As he stands before us, a nation he has sworn to serve with dignity and honor, he will tell us all is well here in the land of Oz. The economy is booming, we're on the verge of seeing his tax cuts becoming permanent, the Patriot Act needs to be made permanent, and Alito needs to be confirmed. The war he will tell us is moving right along. Iraq is well on her way to becoming an independent country, a thriving democracy.
When you hear these things said to you by your Commander in Chief, a man YOU may well have voted for, not once but TWICE. Try remembering a few things.
Our nation now has the highest national debt it has EVER known. EVER. Our children won't have to worry about it. Nope it will our grandchildren who are left to deal with this monumental debt. Yes, there will be those who will tell you it's no big deal. Just ask yourself if it's no big deal why can't we get it paid down? If the economy is booming then why are we seeing Ford Motor Company announcing they will be laying off 30,000 employees over the next few months?
Ask yourself is the Patriot Act (YOU really need to read some of this "ACT, trust me you'll be shocked)really vital to our security or is it just another means of chipping away at the Constitution? Placing more and more power in the executive branch of the government. That's the President by the way. If your a Republican ask yourself if you really want to entrust that kind of power to the next President. Who by the way, just might be another Clinton.
About those tax cuts. Have YOU benefited from them? Do you personally know anyone who has? Or are you and your family still struggling just to make ends meet?
Now, lets talk about Iraq. Lets start with this exert from a story by CNN reporter Michael Holmes.
"It was January 27, 2004, my third "tour" of Iraq. I'm now nearing the end of my fifth, and the sad reality -- for me, at least -- is this place seems less secure each time I've come. More necessary security, more danger, a greater likelihood you could get killed doing your job.

I've had my share of risky assignments, from Afghanistan to Gaza and the West Bank, Rwanda to Romania during the 1989 revolution. None come close to the daily feeling here that anything could happen to you, at any time."

Now add this,
"Stretched by frequent troop rotations to Iraq and Afghanistan, the Army has become a "thin green line" that could snap unless relief comes soon, according to a study for the Pentagon.
Andrew Krepinevich, a retired Army officer who wrote the report under a Pentagon contract, concluded that the Army cannot sustain the pace of troop deployments to Iraq long enough to break the back of the insurgency. "You really begin to wonder just how much stress and strain there is on the Army, how much longer it can continue,"

Do they look like THEY believe this administrations claim that all is getting better? Do YOU?
The next time someone mentions supporting the troops, remember that report by a Mr Krepinevich.
While your at it, remember that now on an almost daily basis we are seeing the ongoing saga with Iran. Condlazza Rice is traisping her way around Europe and the Middle East talking tough talk about what "Iran has to do...". I can't help but wonder just what Ms Rice is going to be doing when Iran tells her she can take her ultimatum and stick it where the sun don't shine? Will she strap on military garb and put her butt on the front lines? Will Bush, or Rumsfield, or Cheney, or Rove? Will THEIR children? No. No, they'll expect you and me to send OUR children, and grandchildren. Just like they expect our children and grandchildren to shoulder the responsibility for country so deep in depth, we owe our souls to China.

This man who stands before you, who told you he was going to be a "uniter" not a divider. He was going to bring honor and dignity to the White House, and he is standing there lying to you. Oh they won't call it lies. No, it's perceptions. It's spin. Of course when Clinton lied about Lewinski that was perception and spin too. Did YOU give HIM a break? Did his lie cost anyone other than himself a single thing?
Speaking of honor and dignity, take a look at the scandal involving numerous Senators and Congressmen. Ask Jack Abramoff if he was greasing the palms of republicans AND democrats? Why would he? Democrats had no power to do him any good. Again, just try reality. Take a look at Duke Cunningham, Tom DeLay and Bob Ney.
It's time for a good old fashioned house cleaning in the halls of Congress. A good many people need to be sent home and maybe to the penalty box (jail). This is an election year. If your state has Senators and Congressmen up for election, take the time to take a long hard look at them. Are they REALLY serving YOUR best interest? Or their own? If all politicians are corrupt then it's time we put a stop to it. Kick them out of office, and keep kicking them out, until they get the message.

"IF" you live in Alabama and you are even thinking of voting for Roy Moore, please let me know because we need to have a very long talk about voting responsibly. Bob Riley is an excellent governor (yes I KNOW he's republican). To even consider replacing him with Roy Moore is sheer idiocy. Seriously. Sorry if that offends you, but this is OUR state we're talking about here.

Okay, rant over. You can go back to your regularly scheduled blogging now.

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

My Man

I am in LOVE! Or in heat. Call it what you want. This man makes my toes curl. Just listening to him sing makes me tingle and tremble in places I'd forgotten I had. HAVE MERCY!!!
I came across him (oooooooo yeah) while flipping through the channels last night. The video was on CMT. Oh lordy what that song did to me. Just listening to it made me weak in the knees

His name is Josh Turner and God in heaven this is one hot sexy man.
That VOICE, those eyes, those lips!!!
Holy Mary Mother of God, I'm gonna go to hell for what I'm thinking about doing with this man.

He has a new song out called "Your Man". If you wanna hear it go HERE, then click on Listening Party, then click on Your Man. If it don't get you in the mood, then there ain't no hope for ya.

Excuse me I need a cold shower. Or a man.
Preferably this one!!

Monday, January 23, 2006

Google this!

So, the government wants to know what we're searching for when we 'Google'. It's interesting to note here, the ONLY reason we're hearing about this is because Google is fighting the subpoena for it's search engin records. Yahoo, and AOL complied without a whimper. Am I surprised? Not one darn bit.
What am sick and damned tired of hearing is this...
"[I think] the government's actions are warranted in this case, they can do pretty much whatever they need to do to keep us safe,"
Safe from what?
Looking at porn?
The government wants Google's search engin records because they contend that this search usage data will help it understand how often web users encounter material considered "harmful to minors" as a result of using a search engine, and to determine how effective filtering software is, according to the motion.
Yeah, right.
Well excuse the heck out of me if I happen to think whether or not I choose to view pornography (or pornography related material) on my home computer is MY business and no body elses. Guess what? Pretty much everyone who visits my blog also visits and reads blogs that have pornography related material ON A DAILY (at least semi-daily) BASIS. Yep, that's right, YOU (and YOU know who I'm talking to). I could name two that fit the bill. I won't but I could. Is that any of my business?
Nope, it is not. But if you're going to lie down and let the government infringe on your right to privacy why shouldn't I?

Speaking of safe.
I've been living in this country most of my life. I lived here BEFORE September 11th, 2001 and I've lived here since. Do I feel any safer now than I did before? Nope, sure don't. Do I somehow think that just because there hasn't been another attack since 9/11 that we're now safer or that possible attacks have been prevented? No, I don't. We hadn't been attacked in seven years prior to 9/11 either. It takes time to plan a major attack. Has anyone noticed that Osama Ben Ladin is STILL alive and making his veiled threats? Is it possible the next big attack is in the works and is just around the corner? Duh!
How far are they/we going to take this notion that the threat of terrorism gives the government and by extention the President, carte blanch for an all assault on our basic constitutional rights?
People have you READ the so called 'Patriot' Act?

Wake UP people. We need to be on our phones, writing letters, getting the message to our Senators and Representatives, "we" the people are NOT willing to sacrifice any more of our rights and freedoms in the name of fighting terrorism. If we continue in this vein, the terrorist has won. Because in the end we will have given up all that makes us what we are. A country of the people, for the people and by the people.
The thing about this war on terror is this, there is no WINNING. Unless we wipe everyone else off the face of the earth. How do you fight a nameless, faceless enemy? Well you don't do it by giving up everything you hold dear.

On Friday in his speech to the RNC, Karl Rove made it clear what the Republican Party's stratagy for the 2006 elections is going to be. "Rove promised to make the war on terrorism a central campaign issue in November 2006." Well hell yeah. Of course they are. Because other wise Americans might have to actually pay attention and deal with the ongoing corruption within the Republican Party, the continual onslaught on the Constitution by this administration, and the war in IRAQ. Which by the way appears to be getting worse rather than better, despite the continued promise by the 'right' that after the elections (ect) things will start to turn around. Guess what? They haven't. And now we have the threat ( and unlike Iraq, a very real one I might add) of Iran. Can anyone tell me how wiretapping, and Google search engin records are going to protect us from IRAN?
How far are they going to take this notion that the threat of terrorism gives the President, the administration, the NSA, or the government the right to invade that we hold most dear.

"As for myself, I'd rather be blown up, right here, right now, than watch the Constitution be torn asunder. I'm serious, blow me right up. Goodnight, Bonzai, Kaboom. But that's not really the choice. Except for in some bizarre and unique scenario (the kind writers of paranoia-fiction might imagine), obtaining warrants, as required by law, is not going to give terrorists any extra opportunities to attack us. That's a scare tactic used by the White House to convince us to give into fear and allow the President to elevate himself above the law, the Constitution and the American people."[source]

Should we allow fear to guide us away from our Constitutional principles? For guidance, let's look to one of our most beloved Founding Fathers...

Benjamin Franklin (whose 300th bithday we celebrate this past week) once said, "They that would give up essential liberty, to obtain a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety."

Of course there will those who will say, what good is liberty if your dead, well I'll ask you this what good is life without liberty? I'll stand alongside Patrick Henry and cry out "Give me liberty or give me death"!
What say you?

Saturday, January 21, 2006

Saturday Scruples

1.) You're interviewing candidates for a job. The best qualified applicant is overweight. Do you hire this person?

Of course!
Why wouldn't I?
Well, there are people who would say no. Not just because overweight people are sometimes unattractive (which can BE important in the workplace), but because of the health issues that often accompany people with weight problems. In all fairness I'd give the same pause for consideration to people who smoke, or appear to drink excessively.

2.) A loved one is in a car accident and is dying. You're asked to donate his organs for a transplant. Do you?(note: you don't know the persons wishes.)

I want to be the better person and say "of course", but, this would be especially hard for me. I'd have to think on it for a while. In the end I suppose I would.

3.) Your adolescent children ask if you ever smoked marijuana when you were young. You did. Do you admit it?

Of course I would. How else could they understand I know what I'm talking about?

4.) At a bookstore cafe, you're reading a new hardcover book with no intention of buying it. You accidentally spill coffee on it. Do you buy the book?


5.) You're feeling "under the weather." If you phone in sick, a colleague will have to do twice the work. Do you go to work?

How 'sick' am I? If I'm merely having a bad day or feeling a bit queasy, no, I'd take myself to work and do MY job. Now, if I'm tossing my cookies, have a fever (over 101.0), have the flu, or something contagious, then yes, I'd stay home. I'd be no help and probably a hinderance as well.

Your turn.

The Interupted Honeymoon

You know what I am sick of hearing about? This damned Cruise Ship Mystery. Every where I look I keep seeing this in the news. Why is this news? It's like the whole Aruba thing. Get a grip people, crap happens. Especially when your careless and associate with people of questionable character. This might be remotely interesting for a week, maybe even two, but the shelf life is way past the 'sell by' date at this stage. Every news journalist on cable news has talked this to death (okay bad choice of words). Bill O'Reilly, Joe Scarborough, Larry King, Nancy Grace, ect. You name em and they've done one or MORE segments on it. So, I have some questions.
First, why are we they still obsessing over this? Two, why was this couple who were suppose to be on their honeymoon hanging out with a bunch of hoodlums? Three, and what I think is the MOST unask and important question of all, where the heck was this guys wife when he was being beat up and tossed overboard (or falling overboard depending on which story you believe). It was their HONEYMOON. Why was she found passed out three doors down, taken to the room tossed on the bed (which by the way supposedly had blood stained sheets) and left. Then several hours later she gets up puts on her make-up and goes to a spa appointment! Meanwhile her brand new husband is MISSING. Excuse me, WHY isn't anyone asking this woman what the hell is up with that? Am I the ONLY one who finds her behavior suspicious? Why isn't anyone looking at her? Because let me tell you , if I was on my honeymoon I'd know where that man was every freaking nano-second. Come night time he'd be in MY bed, doing what honeymooners do best, and LOTS of it. So how come someone was able to get this guy drunk, roll him and toss him overboard while his new bride sleeps on the floor somewhere else? Or even worse he FELL overboard in a drunken stupor, and had she been there, where she SHOULD have been, she might have been able to save him. And why is she now all teeth and smiles when being interviewed? Personally I'd be devastated. Just talking about it would make me hysterical, or at least bring a few tears to my eyes.
Here's my suggestion to Nancy Grace, Larry King and anyone else who's going to continue to cover this yesterday's news. Ask the tough questions. Ask the one's we haven't heard already and the ones that maybe don't have rehearsed answers. If your going to keep yapping about it, at least could you make it interesting?

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

The Path Taken

Your Life Path Number is 9

Your purpose in life is to make the world better

You are very socially conscious and a total idealist.
You think there are many things wrong with the world, and you want to fix them.
You have a vision of how the world could be, and you'll sacrifice almost anything to work towards this dream.

In love, you can easily see the beauty in someone else. And you never cling too tightly.

You are capable of great love, but it's hard for you to focus your love on one person or relationship.
You have a lot of outward focus, and you tend to blame the world for your failures.
You are often disappointed by the realities of life - it's hard for you to accept the shortcomings of the world.

Or, for a different point of view...
Your life path number is 9.

The keys to the nature of a Life Path number 9 person are compassion, generosity, and a very humanitarian attitude. This is the lesson that must be learned in this life. Usually this number produces an individual that is very trustworthy and honorable, and one unlikely to harbor any sort of prejudice. Obviously, this is a rather tall order, but you are, in fact, a person that feels very deeply for individuals less fortunate than yourself, and if you are in a position to help, you certainly will. You tend to be quite sensitive, as you see the world with much feeling and compassion. The 9, being the highest of the single digit numbers, holds an elevated position and poses certain responsibilities. The purpose of life for those with a 9 life path is of a philosophical nature. Judges, spiritual leaders, healers and educators frequently have much 9 energy. Material gains are not overly important, although the quality of some life path 9 people is such that they are materially rewarded in very significant ways. Often, the number 9 life path requires a very selfless attitude and the giving up of material possessions for the common good. Even the very average of those with life path 9 possess extremely compassionate tendencies. The desire to help others, especially the troubled or underprivileged, is strong. You are apt to frequently find yourself being used and let down by others, as your generosity is misused and abused.
The number 9's very deep understanding of life is sometimes manifested in the artistic and literary fields. Here you may be able to express your deep emotional feelings through painting, writing, music, or other art forms. Often, however, there if a great deal of difficulty finding a suitable outlet for the 9 Life Path. The 9 is usually well suited to the helping and healing professions; the number is less inclined to the competitive business environment.

You have the ability to make friends very easily, as people are attracted to your magnetic, open personality. You have a special gift of understanding people, which if used correctly can be of great benefit to others. Your interest in people tends to make you quite social. People just naturally like you because you are so sympathetic, tolerant and broad-minded. In many ways, you are a romantic that can get lost in your loves and passions. Relationships can be difficult for you, however, because it is hard to strike a balance that will work effectively. If your partner is one sharing your giving attitudes, the relationship will be happy and lasting. On the other hand, if you choose a partner whose focus is on material issues, problems will arise quickly.

As do all the life path numbers, the 9 has its negative side, and because of the demanding nature of the truly positive 9, many tend to fail in this category. It is not uncommon for persons with the 9 life path to fight the realities and challenges of purpose imposed here because selflessness is not an easy trait. You may have difficulty believing that giving and a lack of personal ambition can be satisfying. It must be realized and accepted that little long-term satisfaction and happiness is to be gained by rejecting the natural humanitarian inclinations of this path.

What Is YOUR Life Path Number

Monday, January 16, 2006

Martin Luther King

Somehow it slipped past me that today (soon to be yesterday) is/was MLK Day. While I agree there are many 'hero's' who deserve to have a special day (it's not like there aren't plenty to go around) I will not deny this great man deserved every ounce of respect and reverence he is given.
Below is a speech given today in honor of Dr King. I'm not going to name the person who gave the speech (no it wasn't a Clinton), least you be distracted by the person over the content.


Congressman Barr and I have disagreed many times over the years, but we have joined together today with thousands of our fellow citizens-Democrats and Republicans alike-to express our shared concern that America's Constitution is in grave danger.

In spite of our differences over ideology and politics, we are in strong agreement that the American values we hold most dear have been placed at serious risk by the unprecedented claims of the Administration to a truly breathtaking expansion of executive power.

As we begin this new year, the Executive Branch of our government has been caught eavesdropping on huge numbers of American citizens and has brazenly declared that it has the unilateral right to continue without regard to the established law enacted by Congress to prevent such abuses.

It is imperative that respect for the rule of law be restored.

So, many of us have come here to Constitution Hall to sound an alarm and call upon our fellow citizens to put aside partisan differences and join with us in demanding that our Constitution be defended and preserved.

It is appropriate that we make this appeal on the day our nation has set aside to honor the life and legacy of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., who challenged America to breathe new life into our oldest values by extending its promise to all our people.

On this particular Martin Luther King Day, it is especially important to recall that for the last several years of his life, Dr. King was illegally wiretapped-one of hundreds of thousands of Americans whose private communications were intercepted by the U.S. government during this period.
There have of course been other periods of American history when the Executive Branch claimed new powers that were later seen as excessive and mistaken. Our second president, John Adams, passed the infamous Alien and Sedition Acts and sought to silence and imprison critics and political opponents.
When his successor, Thomas Jefferson, eliminated the abuses he said: "[The essential principles of our Government] form the bright constellation which has gone before us and guided our steps through an age of revolution and reformation... [S]hould we wander from them in moments of error or of alarm, let us hasten to retrace our steps and to regain the road which alone leads to peace, liberty and safety."
We have a duty as Americans to defend our citizens' right not only to life but also to liberty and the pursuit of happiness. It is therefore vital in our current circumstances that immediate steps be taken to safeguard our Constitution against the present danger posed by the intrusive overreaching on the part of the Executive Branch and the President's apparent belief that he need not live under the rule of law.

I endorse the words of Bob Barr, when he said, "The President has dared the American people to do something about it. For the sake of the Constitution, I hope they will."


No truer words have ever been spoken.

Does anyone really believes the wiretapping being done by the NSA is restricted to terrorist or terrorist sympathizers. It all comes down to one's definition of who or what qualilifies as a 'terrorist'. Brenda says she has a little terrorist living in her house. Does this mean her phones should be tapped, her emails read, her private life invaded? Think that's absurb? Try telling that to the mother of the 9 month old who's name is on the 'no fly' list for 'suspected terrorist sympathizers'.
Dr King once said, "Nothing in all the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity."

We sorely need another Dr Martin Luther King. Someone to stand up for simple freedom and equality for all. Until one steps up, it's up to "WE" the people to decide where we go from here.

Monday Madness

Haven't done this one in awhile, so lets give it a go.

1. Before I walk out the door, I always check to make sure I have my cell phone.
2. I can't seem to catch up on my blogging.
3. The one surface in my house that always seems to get cluttered fast is the dinning room table.
4. If I sleep past noon, I feel that I've slept in too late.
5. No matter how hard I try, I just can't seem to get to bed early.
6. I hope to have my income taxes done by April 15th.
7. This year I'd like to make more time for reading.

Okay, it's your turn!

Sunday, January 15, 2006

Sunday Sermon

The Beatitudes

1. And seeing the multitudes, He (Jesus) went up on a mountain, and when He was seated His disciples came to Him.
2. Then He opened His mouth and taught them, saying:
3.Blessed are the poor in spirit,
For theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
4.Blessed are those who mourn,
For they shall be comforted.
5.Blessed are the meek,
For they shall inherit the earth.

6.Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
For they shall be filled.
7.Blessed are the merciful,
For they shall obtain mercy.
8.Blessed are the pure in heart,
For they shall see God.
9.Blessed are the peacemakers,
For they shall be called sons of God.
10.Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness' sake,
For theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

For me these verses by Jesus himself, speak to the heart of Christianity. Wherever he went, whenever he preached, Jesus always spoke of love, compassion, and forgiveness. Not of judgment, ("Judge not, that ye be not judged" Mt. 7:1)
Even as he hung from the cross, he spoke no evil of those who put him there.
Come to think of it I don't recall Jesus ever quoting any scripture from the old testament. Nor did he speak of the Ten Commandments.
Christianity by its very definition is a religion based on the life and teachings of Jesus Christ.
Back a few weeks ago I read a post by Curious Servant, where he spoke of being a Christ Follower . He said he preferred that term over Christian. Because "Being a Christian for many folks is no more challenging that being a member of the Rotary Club." I couldn't agree more.
I am far from perfect. So very far. The road to righteousness is a long and winding one for me. One littered with temptation at every turn. As I walk that road, I often (everyday) stumble and fall. I am guilty of having unkind, often evil thoughts. I often have lust (envy,greed,gluttony and even hate) in my heart. I am so very unworthy of the love Jesus offers. But it is that love that gives me hope. And strength. The strength to face each day.
I can't help but believe we'd be living in a better world if more people followed the path of Jesus, rather than sitting around making judgments on the lives of others.
I wish you all a blessed, and happy week ahead.

Friday, January 13, 2006

An Old Farmer's Advice

I'm sure everyone's seen these before but, they're so insightful they bear repeating.

* Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong.

* Keep skunks, bankers and lawyers at a distance.

* Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.

* A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor.

* Words that soak into your ears are whispered...not yelled.

* Meanness don't jes' happen overnight.

* Forgive your enemies. It messes up their heads.

* Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you.

* It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.

* You cannot unsay a cruel word.

* Every path has a few puddles.

* When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.

* The best sermons are lived, not preached.

* Most of the stuff people worry about ain't never gonna happen anyway.

* Don't judge folks by their relatives.

* Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.

* Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you'll enjoy it a second time.

* Don't interfere with somethin' that ain't botherin' you none.

* Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.

* If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.
* Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.

* The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal with, watches you from the mirror every mornin'.

* Always drink upstream from the herd.

* Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad judgment.

* Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back in.

* If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.

* Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

Wednesday, January 11, 2006

It is better to have loved and lost

than to never have loved at all

David's post about his anniversary and the memories of how his marriage had been in the beginning sent my mind drifting down memory lane. It was so sweet to see him write about his wife in such an open and loving way. His is a story shared by many. A sweet love, worn down by the ravages of time and the realities of life. If I could make one wish for David, it would be that his heart will find it's way back to the woman he loved, and I believe still loves. That he will be able to let go of his hurt, his disappointment, and to simply love again. Because there is no greater happiness than two hearts in love. Just ask Carl and Leslie, and Curtis and Ellen.
For so long my heart has been held hostage by my mind. My mind refusing to allow anything to break through the wall protecting the warm inner core of me. Because to love is to hurt.
I know this. I've hurt more than some could ever imagine.
Almost everyone I've ever loved has hurt me. That doesn't make me special. If you open your heart up, you are venerable to pain. One without the other doesn't exist. It simply is what it is. Life is filled with little disappointments, big ones too. It's how we deal with them that makes all the difference.
For a very short time, a long time ago, I knew love. A wonderful love. The kind of love you read about in books. One with those little secret looks that lovers share. Stolen kisses. Hands touching as you pass by one another, no one but the two of you notices, but it happens, that little tingle of excitement. Knowing there's someone who can make the world disappear with just one look. I can remember my heart beating so fast as he held me, in our stolen moments. I remember feeling his heart beating as I pressed against his chest. I remember waking up in the morning filled with excitement knowing I'd be spending the day with him. Even if we couldn't always be next to each other, we were never really apart. I remember his eyes, his smile, the texture of his skin, the way he could make me feel with just one look. I remember the way he loved me. Through his eyes I saw the me I'd only dreamed I could be.
In the end that love almost destroyed me. The agony of having to walk away, to give him up, was tortuous. The reasons were many and all the right ones. No matter that my heart would be [it seemed] irrevocably broken. It was an anguish I swore I'd never know again. The wall was built. My heart protected. My mind the guardian.
Recently I heard a song and all those memories came flooding back. I was listening to the oldies station on the radio(the same one where we heard it the for the first time) and there it was. Such a simple little song. Very old, so old most people today don't even remember it, or haven't ever heard of it. But it was 'our' favorite song. He'd never heard it either, but the first time he did, he said " that's our song". There I was driving down the highway and it came on.

I love how your eyes close whenever you kiss me
And when I'm away from you I love how you miss me
I love the way you always treat me tenderly
But darlin' most of all I love how you love me

I love how your heart beats whenever I hold you
I love how you think of me without being told to
I love the way your touch is always heavenly
But darlin' most of all I love how you love me ...

Oh the pain. The tears fell. I had to pull over and stop. Then the sobs. Gushing, gutwrenching sobs. Sobs I'd held inside of me. Never allowing them to break through. For fear if I ever started crying I'd never stop.
I cried. I cried for the love I lost. Then for the years that followed. And the knowledge that I'd made the wrong choice.
All those right reasons don't seem so right anymore. My children are all grown. Each one has his or her own life. With little time for Mom. The marriage I chose to save, is a shell. One in which two people hide from reality. A marriage built on necessity and shrouded in lies and deceit. This is the greatest pain of all. But it's a pain I must face. A reality I must accept and somehow forgive myself for.
I cannot go back. The hands of time cannot be rewound. It simply is what it is. Life. To err is human, to forgive divine. To forgive oneself, may be the most difficult task of all.
Now, I must find a way to let it go. It won't be easy. Still, this I must do. I'm not so old that love can't find me again. The first step is to allow myself to be open to the possibility. To the possibility of loving again. It could happen. And even if it doesn't it won't be because my heart wasn't willing. Or that my mind stood in the way.
The fear is there. I could get hurt again. But in the end, is it not better to have loved and lost, than to never have loved at all?

[ps: I'd like to thank
Queenie and Michelle, for giving me the courage to write this post.]

Monday, January 09, 2006

New California?

sorry Canada I'm moving to New California!

A few days ago I received the following email. Most of you have probably already seen it, but I just had to share it with you anyway. It's just chock full of facts and good ideas. Twould only that it could be so.

Dear Red States:

We're ticked off at the way you've treated California (all the blue states for that matter*), and we've decided we're leaving. We intend to form our own country, and we're taking the other Blue States with us.

In case you aren't aware, that includes Hawaii, Oregon, Washington, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois and all the Northeast. We believe this split will be beneficial to the nation, and especially to the people of the new country of New California.

To sum up briefly:
You get Texas, Oklahoma and all the slave states.
We get stem cell research and the best beaches.

We get Elliot Spitzer. You get Ken Lay.

We get the Statue of Liberty. You get OpryLand.

We get Intel and Microsoft. You get WorldCom.

We get Harvard. You get Ole' Miss.

We get 85 percent of America's venture capital and entrepreneurs.

You get Alabama.

We get two-thirds of the tax revenue; you get to make the red states pay their fair share.

Since our aggregate divorce rate is 22 percent lower than the Christian Coalition's, we get a bunch of happy families. You get a bunch of miserable people in loveless marriages who engage in adultry on a daily basis. Either in reality or fantasy.**

Please be aware that Nuevo California will be pro-choice and antiwar, and we're going to want all our citizens back from Iraq at once. If you need people to fight, ask your evangelicals.

They have kids they're apparently willing to send to their deaths for no purpose, and they don't care if you don't show pictures of their children's caskets coming home We do wish you success in Iraq, and hope that the WMDs turn up, but we're not willing to spend our resources in Bush's Quagmire.

With the Blue States in hand, we will have firm control of 80 percent of the country's fresh water, more than 90 percent of the pineapple and lettuce, 92 percent of the nation's fresh fruit, 95 percent of America's quality wines (you can serve French wines at state dinners) 90 percent of all cheese, 90 percent of the high tech industry, most of the U.S. low-sulfur coal, all

living redwoods, sequoias and condors, all the Ivy and Seven Sister schools, plus Princeton, Harvard, Yale, Stanford, Caltech and MIT.

With the Red States, on the other hand, you will have to cope with 88 percent of all obese Americans (and their projected health care costs), 92 percent of all U.S. mosquitoes, nearly 100 percent of the tornadoes, 90 percent of the hurricanes, 99 percent of all Southern Baptists, virtually 100 percent of all televangelists, Rush Limbaugh, Bob Jones University, Clemson and the University of Georgia.

We get Seattle, Hawaii and Yosemite, thank you.

Additionally, 38 percent of those in the Red states believe Jonah was actually swallowed by a whale, 62 percent believe life is sacred unless we're discussing the death penalty or gun laws, 44 percent say that evolution is only a theory, 53 percent that Saddam was involved in 9/11 and 61 percent of you crazy bastards believe you are people with higher morals than we lefties.

By the way, we're taking the good pot, too. You can have that dirt weed they grow in Mexico.


the happy citizens of New California.

*My addition
**My addition as well.

Oh yeah, I am so moving to Washington state. I have some good friends on Whidbey Island, maybe they (Phyl, Mary Lou?) will put me up. Yeah I know one of them is a republican, but with all the news about what bad boys and girls the republicans have been of late, I might be able to convert her.

I just have one question. All that good pot we're taking, is that going to be legal for personal use?

Sunday, January 08, 2006

To Thine Ownself Be True

One of my first post for this year was all about new beginnings and having a new attitude. Over the past few months I'd grown more and more depressed and maudlin. At times I found I could barely summon the courage and strength to get out of bed. I felt lost and alone. Something was wrong. I not only didn't know how to fix it, but I wasn't even sure what was at the bottom of my feelings of hopelessness and isolation.
I knew a good part of it was the seasonal depression I experience every year around Christmas. I'm sorry but Christmas just isn't a good time for me. It hasn't been for years.
What was strange was that it came on earlier this year. Usually I love Thanksgiving and even Halloween. But not this year. Clearly something was wrong. I just couldn't grasp what it was.

The last week of December I did a lot of soul searching. I spent hours thinking and pondering, trying to pinpoint when things started to change.
It hadn't gone unnoticed by me that the number of people who visit my blog has diminished over the past year. But, it wasn't just my blog. There were others, in my 'real world', who were slowly slipping away.
Clearly my 'passion' offend some. Being human I cared that people I valued (both real and virtual) in my life, felt uncomfortable around me. It bothered me that some of those people simply stopped coming around.
Gradually I learned to suppress my feelings. After all the last thing I wanted to do was "offend' anyone. Yes, God forbid "I" offend them. So what if their narrowminded, bigoted point of views, or their lack of compassion or concern offended me?
It was then I realized where lay the roots of my 'depression'. In trying to appease others, to make others more comfortable around me, I was loosing ME. The part of me that makes me, "ME". My passion.
Apparently "I" am a woman incapable of apathy. When I care, I CARE. And I can't keep it to myself. When I see what I perceive to be a wrong, I am compelled by something deep inside of me to speak out. When I fight that need, when I force it to lie down and be silent, all of me goes silent. I knew then I had to make some hard choices. Either I chose to follow my heart, and refuse to silence that voice that cries out inside of me, at the slightest sign of injustice or cruelty, or I close my eyes, put my 'happy face' and pretend not to see or care. Choose the ladder and I'd have a plethora of friends, the former and I most likely would find myself spending a great deal of time alone.

After much soul searching I came to understand, if I bury what is essentially "ME", I am of no value to anyone. Least of all myself. The answer, while somewhat painful, was simple.
Because at the end of the road when we are all held accountable, when our maker says "What did YOU do to help...", I need to be able to say "Lord I did the best I could...".
I cared enough to get involved. To take a stand and to speak up.
As one by one they stripped away at the things I've held dear about my country. I spoke out.
As they took the Christian faith and turned it into a means of browbeating, judging, and berating people, I fought back. I reached down deep inside of me, screwed up my courage and I took a stand.
Along the way it cost me. People I thought were my friends turned their backs and walked away. When I was attacked, few came to my defense. Still I stood my ground.
The Lord said " Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye did it unto one of these my brethren, even these least, ye did it unto me."[Matthew 25:40]
This Lord is how I chose to serve. By speaking out for those who have no voice.
This computer is my voice. It is my means of making a difference. I will use whatever means I have at my disposal to do what I can to make a difference.
If few come and read, so be it. If few will stand beside me, I will stand alone.
On the other hand, if in some small way I give even one person the strength to stand up and be counted, then I will have served well.

This is me. This is who I am. I can be nothing less.

Friday, January 06, 2006

The Book of Daniel

part II

The opening scene was Father Daniel going to the police station to pick up his teenage daughter who'd been arrested for drug possession (marijuana). Even though he was upset, and angry, his first question to her was "Are you alright". She'd done something wrong, and he was pretty mad, but his primary concern was that she was safe and okay. I can imagine the conversation in the car on their way home has been played out many times in many families over the years.
I'm not going to go through the program scene by scene, it's just that particular one stood out in my mind. It reminded me of someone I know.
There was nothing blasphemous or anti-Christian or anti-religious. In fact it was just the opposite. If I didn't already know it, I'd know by watching The Book of Daniel, Christian families are just ordinary people, trying to live their lives as best they can.
The character of Jesus was portrayed as someone kind, loving, understanding, and yes with a sense of humor. Much the way I suspect Jesus is.
I watched it, I enjoyed it, and I'll be watching again.
If you've ever wanted to know more about my personal life, just watch this show, there's more than one member of my family being portrayed here. I'll let you venture a guess as to which one best portrays me. ;)

Now, for those who've so ardently criticized this program. Condemning it before it ever aired, I'd like to say this. Did you perchance ever see the "Oh God" movies? You know the one's where God is portrayed as this senile old man, dressed in polyester, who goes around acting pretty much like a semi-lustful lunatic? How about Joan of Arcadia? Where God (or Jesus, I was never quite sure) was a different character each week. Sometimes a grungy, hoodlum looking teenager, sometimes a crazy woman, ect. Over the years God and Jesus have been portrayed in many different ways and in many different scenarios. Some good some bad. It's man's attempt to humanize that which he is in awe of. At any rate, make no mistake, men like Pat Robertson and James Dobson do more to blaspheme God and the Christian faith than any movie or TV program ever thought of doing.
The Book of Daniel is probably not an Emmy winning program. But it's good entertainment. Mostly it's just another vehicle for the far right to use in their attempts to determine what the public is allowed to watch. If you think that's not the case, remember this. Every station that refused to air the program because some station manager decided it was 'inappropriate' was in reality in violation of our civil rights. How? Because they took it upon themselves to decide what the people of those area's would be allowed to watch. What happens when stations in large metropolitan area's start deciding that religious programs (such as Billy Graham or Oral Roberts) are inappropriate for viewers of the areas they provide coverage for? When you allow censorship in one instance you are opening the door to abuse. And you can rest assured it will come.
Think about that next time you applaud a television station for refusing to allow people to decide what they will and will not be watching. It's a slippery slope and one you should think long and hard about before you start down it.

What if God Were One of Us

Tonight NBC will air the two hour premiere of a new their new (and already controversial) sitcom The Book of Daniel.
The conservative American Family Association already has expressed dismay at the series and has urged local stations not to broadcast it. NBC says "the is show "dramatic and engaging" though "offbeat and comical. It walks an interesting tonal line."

Daniel Webster,is an Episcopalian Priest, who struggles to maintain his family and his faithful flock of congregates. In the show's opening scene, Daniel's 16-year-old daughter, Grace (Alison Pill), is arrested for selling marijuana to pay for her manga comics. His oldest son, Peter (Christian Campbell), is hiding his homosexuality from his grandfather. And Adam (Ivan Shaw), his adopted Chinese teenager, is an unbridled skirt-chaser who hooks up with the daughter of another church official.
There's more: A third son has died of leukemia. Daniel's brother-in-law disappears after absconding with church money. His mother has Alzheimer's Disease. Oh, and the housekeeper is diabetic.

"It's a little wacky, a little out there," says Susanna Thompson (Once and Again), who plays Judith, Daniel's upper-crust, martini-swilling wife.

I have to wonder, is it?
In our society (especially these days) the leaders of our churches are somehow expected to be perfect. Everything they do, good or bad is magnified. We expect our ministers, our priests and their families to be living breathing examples of virtue, morality, integrity and Christianity. Yet we forget that none of these men's (or women's) family members (with the possible exception of their wives) actually chose to be in this position. I can only imagine what it would be like living one's life under a microscope. I know I wouldn't like it. Not one bit. I can assure you neither would my children.

So, maybe this program will give us all a chance to see what life is really like for the people, who are all too human. Of course not every minister or priest has a family like this. But, I'm betting there's at least one character that everyone can look at and say "that is just my brother, sister, cousin, aunt, uncle, ect".

I can't help but think of the song by Joan Osbourne, "What if God Were One of Us".
What if God was one of us
Just a slob like one of us
Just a stranger on the bus
Trying to make his way home

Would we recognize him? If he were dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, or maybe dirty work pants and heavy boots. Or maybe even on a motorcycle, with a helmet. Would we know him? Would we sit down beside him on the bus? Would we give him our spare change if he ask for it? Would we take the time to find out who he was? Or would we judge him on his looks, his clothes, the color of his hair or skin? Or on what others had to say about him?
Having not seen the show yet, I can't say what I think of it. But, I think I'll take the time to find out more before I decide if it's an insightful comedy, or an insult (or threat) to Christians everywhere. And maybe next time I go to the grocery store I'll take the time to stop and speak to that little man who sits on the bench next to the drink machines. Maybe I'll ask him his name, and offer to buy him a drink, heck maybe I'll even splurge for some Chinese (there's a little Chinese restaurant right next door).
The Book of Daniel airs tonight on your local channel at 9 PM EST (8 Central). Maybe you could check it out. Who knows, you just might recognize one (or more) of your relatives. Then again, they might recognize YOU!

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

By Special Request...

1) Take a trip across country (into Canada) to meet the people of my 'virtual community'.
2 ) Kiss that special someone
3) See my grandchildren all grown up
4) Take a trip to South Africa to meet Michelle
5) Make a difference in people's lives
6) Meet Oprah Winfrey, Bill Clinton, Jimmy, and Roslynn Carter.
7) Win the lottery so I can do all the things listed above!

1) Rollerskate (not anymore)
2) Keep my mouth shut about politics
3) Make a budget and stick to it
4) Fly a plane
5) Run a marathon
6) Understand some people's need to hurt and humiliate others.
7) Give up hope of doing the seven things I want to do before I die

1) Eyes
2) Teeth
3) Kindness
4) The way he dresses
5) His sense of humor.
6) His smile
7) His ability to respect others.

1) You're kidding!.
2) Wicked cool (I know that's so outdated)
3) Damnit
4) Freaking (whatever applies at the moment)
5) Oh My GAWD!
6) Kasey "will you..."
7) I love you

1) Cross Bones by Kathy Reichs(actually all her books)
2) All of the Stephanie Plum books by Janet Evonovitch
3) Meloncoly Baby by Robert B. Parker (actually all of his books too)
4) A Time to Kill by John Grishim
5) Imperial Hubris--Why the west is losing the war on terror by Anonymous(Michael Scheuer, a former CIA operative)
6) My ninth grade world history book
7) The Bible

(I don't watch movies over and over. These are some of the very few I've watched more than once)
1) The Wizard of Oz
2) The Godfather ( I & II)
.3) Pulp Fiction
4) Terms of Endearment
Sorry that's about it. Two movies I really want to see are "Syriana", and "Good Night and Good Luck".

Heck if I know. Just about everyone I know has done this one. If you haven't then I tag YOU! So do it already.

Monday, January 02, 2006

New Beginnings

Whew it's over!
Another Christmas come and gone. As usual I went through my sappy, whiney, maudlin phase. Making me most unpleasant company for anyone who enjoys the Christmas season. Don't you just love hanging out with people who put a damper on the party? Moaning and groaning, self-indulgent, self-aggrandize people. Oh please! Nobody wants to hear someone whinnying day after day how their life sucks. Okay, your life sucks. So do something about it or shut the heck up. Yes, I know we all need to vent now and then, but not every freaking day. So, I've decided it's time to 'get over it already'. As Patti LaBelle says I'm gonna get me a new attitude!
Of course with a new attitude comes change. I know, most of us are set in our ways and don't really embrace change. Oh well, get over it, this ole girl's making some changes.
For starters I'm getting back to my roots. I've traveled the world over. Been places some people only dream about. Most of my life I've been a bit embarrassed to admit, "I'm from Alabama". While I wasn't raised here, I was born here (Anniston), and my family ancestry is firmly rooted in the heart of Dixie. Well the time has come for me to acknowledge who I am and whence I come. I'm a southern woman. Born in the South. Maybe not raised here, but I was raised by a southern woman. The women who held the strongest influence over my life were all southern women. Southern traditions where the ones observed in my family. And that's nothing to be ashamed of. I am what I am.
There's nothing else is quite like the South. Not to say there's not beauty elsewhere. I've been from Alaska to New York, and have seen beautiful things there and in between, but there is nothing to compare with the beauty of the South. From the vast mountains and sparkling lakes to the white sand beaches, Alabama is a state of beauty. The beaches of Gulf Shores are probably the best kept secret of the south. Their white sands rival any found along the Emerald Coast. I could spend days in Mobile, touring their majestic southern homes. Homes that date back to the days of the Civil War. Did you know that Mobile has a Mardi Gra celebration every year? Then there's the northern part of Bama. Cheaha State Park has some of the most beautiful and breathtaking scenery you could ever wish to see. Sand Mountain, north of Gadsden is unbelievably beautiful. I could go on and on but you get the idea.
Granted Alabama is not what one would call a progressive state. People here live their lives mired firmly in tradition. Change does not come easy to them. But come it does. Kicking and screaming time has drug Alabamans into the 21st century. Yes we probably will elect Roy Moore governor this year. Well not "WE" (I'll be supporting Ms Lucy Baxley). To tell you the truth I don't see that much worse than the people of California electing 'The Terminator'. Or Minnesota electing Jesse Ventura.

As you can see I've made some changes to the blog. A new look and a new name. Just Breathe... served me well, but I'm moving on. I'm getting back to basics. There will still be a bit of patchwork here and there. Because I am a woman of many 'patches'. But, in the end, I am a Southern Woman and I live in Alabama. I think Bama Belle says it pretty well. Viola! I have a new name! I hope you like it. I know I do.
Yawl come now, yah hear!

Sunday, January 01, 2006


2006--Year of the Dog

At my house, every year is the year of the DOG.

These are my [DOG] babies, they're just so darn cute, don't you think?

People born in the Year of the Dog possess the best traits of human nature. They have a deep sense of loyalty, are honest, and inspire other people's confidence because they know how to keep secrets. But Dog People are somewhat selfish, terribly stubborn, and eccentric. They care little for wealth, yet somehow always seem to have money. They can be cold emotionally and sometimes distant at parties. They can find fault with many things and are noted for their sharp tongues. Dog people make good leaders. They are compatible with those born in the Years of the Horse, Tiger, and Rabbit.

As for me,

I'm a Rooster.
People born in the Year of the Rooster are deep thinkers, capable, and talented. They like to be busy and are devoted beyond their capabilities and are deeply disappointed if they fail. People born in the Rooster Year are often a bit eccentric, and often have rather difficult relationship with others. They always think they are right and usually are! They frequently are loners and though they give the outward impression of being adventurous, they are timid. Rooster people's emotions like their fortunes, swing very high to very low. They can be selfish and too outspoken, but are always interesting and can be extremely brave. They are most compatible with Ox, Snake, and Dragon.

Whatever you are (you can find out here ). I wish you and your's a Happy New Year's. May the upcoming year be filled with joy, happiness, hope and prosperity for you. May your lives be spiritually enriched. May those who seek it find love. May those who need it be granted good health. May we all be graced with compassion for our fellowman. And may God bless the world.

An Audience of One
A Touch Of Heaven
Always Victoria
Bacon and Eh's
Causin a Kimmotion!
Chocolate Starfish
Critter Chick
Defiance Dolls
Emptying My Head
Joe Cool
Life After Nexcom
Life on Whidbey
Lumbering Soul
Mind Diversion
My Insanity
Out in the Open
Southern Secrets
Split Splat (KB)
Talk With Desiree
Txoceanlover's Laments
What's Up Down South
Wind Spirit
Star Wars Fan Films