Thursday, March 31, 2005

Do Unto Others...



Godspeed, sweet Terri.
~~~~~~~~~~





"No one from her side of the family was with her at the moment of her death,her brother had been expelled from the room at Michael Schiavo's request moments before the end came."
" Terri Schiavo's ashes will be buried in an undisclosed location near Philadelphia so that her immediate family doesn't show up and turn the burial into a media spectacle, a member of the Schiavo family said Thursday."[ Source ]




To the very end he kept her family away from her. She will be buried among strangers.
May he rot in hell for the grief he has brought her family and for the facilitation of her death.

Friday's Folly

laid back angel
Laid back and reserved, nothing scares you because
of the serenity about you. You are good at
calming people down and have not a care in the
world. Stress is your least of problems,
infact, you have no problems. You are
optimistic and know how to make others smile.
Good work!

Yeah, right. That doesn't even LOOK like me much less sound like me. Well except for the whole laid back part.



Which Angel are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Wednesday, March 30, 2005

Mid-week Musings

You scored as Christianity.

Your views are most similar to those of Christianity.
Do more research on Christianity and possibly consider being baptized
and accepting Jesus, if you aren't already Christian.

Christianity is the second of the Abrahamic faiths; it follows
Judaism and is followed by Islam. It differs in its belief of Jesus,
as not a prophet nor historical figure, but as God in human form.
The Holy Trinity is the concept that God takes three forms: the Father,
the Son (Jesus), and the Holy Ghost (sometimes called Holy Spirit).
Jesus taught the idea of instead of
seeking revenge, one should love his or her neighbors and
enemies. Christians believe that Jesus died on the cross
to save humankind and forgive people's sins.


Christianity

71%

Islam

67%

Buddhism

54%

Judaism

33%

Paganism

29%

Hinduism

21%

agnosticism

13%

Satanism

13%

atheism

13%

Which religion is the right one for you? (new version)
created with QuizFarm.com


Well, this was an interesting little quiz.

Tuesday, March 29, 2005

The Prime Directive

Okay peeps, here's the deal. If I fall ill, or I'm in an accident, or whatEVer, and my azz is in a coma, or some vegetative state. I DO NOT want to be unhooked from what ever machines it takes to keep my azz breathing. I want everything humanly (or even super humanly) possible done to bring me back. If I can't be brought back then keep me alive until I can. If it cost hundreds of thousands of dollars, so what? Our government wastes that much on stupid crap anyway. So why not invest some of it in me? I'm worth it aren't I?
Never, ever, never do I want to be starved. I want big Mac's twice a week, even if I get them through a straw or tube. Turkey for Thanksgiving, and ham for Christmas and Easter. Just get a BIG straw or tube. Dessert would be nice now and then too. Especially, PIE!
I want my family and friends to visit me at least three times a week. EACH! Don't let it bother you when those doctors say I'm brain dead. Heck I'm already brain dead half the time anyway. If they say I don't know anything, don't let that bother you either, I don't know too awful much now. If they tell you I'm feeling no pain, don't you believe it. I have a very low threshold for pain. I'm feeling something all the time. A shot of Jack D or Canadian Mist in the ole feeding tube would be perfectly acceptable. And much appreciated.
Someone should read to me once in awhile. None of that boring crap either. The Bible will be fine, but only on Sundays, and maybe Wednesday. Rolling Stone at least once a week please.
Keep a tv in my room. You all know what shows I like (if there's doubts, I'll make a list), see to it that it's tuned to the appropriate channed on the appropriate nights. Soap operas will be okay, but only Bold & Beautiful and All My Children.
A foot rub now and then wouldn't hurt. And maybe even a little back massage too. Lots of sponge baths will be in order. With nice smelling bubble bath, please. If any of you men folks should feel inclined to take advantage of my vegetative body, please close the drapes and shut the door. After all even coma-girls need their dignity.
If they ever get that whole freezing thing perfected, I want that too.

Monday, March 28, 2005

Monday Musings

It's been a long, lovely, rainy weekend. Mother Nature has given my world a shower (and what a shower it was!) to wash away the last vestiges of winter. Everything smells fresh, crisp, and clean. Leaves are sprouting out to cover barren branches,flowers dot the landscapes as far as the eye can see. Birds are singing, bees are buzzing. The smell of lawns being mowed will soon fill the air. The crocus proudly heralds the arrival of Spring!
Easter in this Podunt household was a quiet affair. Our neighbors took Zach to an all day (indoor) Easter Fest. I am told there was hunting of eggs, chocolately delights, tasty food, and games were played. All appropriately sandwiched between morning and evening worship services. A grand time was had by all. Well by Zach & company at least. "I" snuggled up with my cozy afghan and a good book, Kasey recovered from a hard night of partying by snoozing off an on all day. Robby slept after a hard night of work. The hubs is away on his monthly sojour with his upcountry relatives. At six we, joined by Andrea, gathered in the living room for dinner with the Hills (as in Hank,Peggy,Bobby,& Lou Ann), and Simpsons. I love dinner guest that I don't have to clean up after. Not that "I" would be doing the cleaning up anyway.
I hope everyone's weekend was as pleasant and restful as mine.

Sunday, March 27, 2005

The Message of Christ


The Resurrection of Jesus is for most Christians the defining moment in the Christian faith.

Without the Resurrection, Jesus would have been just a hapless victim of tyranny. His message of love, forgiveness and hope would have been dumped along with his body. His words would have been long forgotten along with his name.

But that is not what happened. Three days after his Crucifixion, followers of Jesus began to announce that he was alive. And while cynics and skeptics have long questioned what actually happened on that first Easter, it's hard to question the results of the belief in what happened. In the centuries since that first announcement, followers of Jesus have multiplied exponentially.

Today, Christianity is a world religion. Followers of Christ can be found in almost every corner of the earth. Where there are not followers of Christ, there are likely Christian missionaries trying to persuade folks to become followers of Christ. [source]

I find it tragically poignant that as we celebrate the death and Resurrection of Jesus so many seem to have forgotten what his message was.

Jesus promised we would inherit the kingdom of God if we feed the hungry, give drink to the thirsty, welcome the stranger, clothe the naked, comfort the sick and visit those in prison (Matthew 25:31-46). Jesus reminded each of us to care for all people. He asks that we see the stranger in a new light, not as separate, different or unknown but as connected to us.

When we live as Jesus asked, we heighten our sensitivity to people who are suffering. We, are called upon to be generous with our compassion, our time, our talent and our money.
The word Christian means Christ like. Yet so few of those who would stand before us and preach embody the simple love and compassion that Christ demonstrated. Instead they set themselves up as judges of men. Telling others "unless you do as I say (not as I do) you cannot be a Christian". This was not Christ's message.

"Whatever you have done for the least of my brethren you have done it to me" (Matthew 26:40).

The happiest people in the world are those who learn this lesson early in life.

Through Christ's death, resurrection and promises, Easter is a reminder of what can be ours.


May you and your family have a blessed Easter.

Saturday, March 26, 2005

Out of the Mouth's of Babes

1. A kindergarten pupil told his teacher he'd found a cat, but it was dead. "How do you know that the cat was dead?" she asked her pupil. "Because I pissed in its ear and it didn't move," answered the child innocently. "You did WHAT ? ! ?" the teacher exclaimed in surprise. "You know,"explained the boy, "I leaned over and went 'Pssst!' and it didn't move."

2. A small boy is sent to bed by his father. Five minutes later....... "Da-ad"?...." "What?" "I'm thirsty, can you bring me a drink of water?" "No, You had your chance. Lights out." Five minutes later: "Da-aaaad ?"...." "WHAT?" "I'm THIRSTY, can I have a drink of water?" " I told you NO! If you ask again, I'll have to spank you!!" Five minutes later......"Daaaa-aaaad ?"..... "WHAT!?" "When you come in to spank me, can you bring a drink of water?"

3. An exasperated mother, whose son was always getting into mischief, finally asked him "How do you expect to get into Heaven?" The boy thought it over and said, "Well, I'll run in and out, and in and out, and keep slamming the door until St. Peter says, "For Heaven's sake, Dylan, come in or stay out!'"

4. One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mother was tucking her son into bed. She was about to turn off the light when he asked with a tremor in his voice, "Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?" The mother smiled and gave him a reassuring hug. "I can't dear," she said. "I have to sleep in Daddy's room." A long silence was broken at last by his shaky little voice: "The big sissy."

5. It was that time, during the Sunday morning service, for the children's sermon. All the children were invited to come forward. One little girl was wearing a particularly pretty dress, and as she sat down, the pastor leaned over and said, "That is a very pretty dress. Is it your Easter Dress?" The little girl replied, directly into the pastor's clip-on microphone, "Yes, and my Mom says it's a bitch to iron."

6. When I was six months pregnant with my third child, my three year old came into the room when I was just getting ready to get into the shower. She said, "Mommy, you are getting fat!" I replied, "Yes, honey, remember Mommy has a baby growing in her tummy." "I know," she replied, but what's growing in your butt?"

7. A little boy was doing his math homework. He said to himself, "Two plus five, that son of a bitch is seven. Three plus six, that son of a bitch is nine".... His mother heard what he was saying and gasped, "What are you doing?" The little boy answered, "I'm doing my math homework, Mom." "And this is how your teacher taught you to do it?" the mother asked. "Yes," he answered. Infuriated, the mother asked the teacher the next day, "What are you teaching my son in math?" The teacher replied, "Right now, we are learning addition." The mother asked, "And are you teaching them to say two plus two, that son of a bitch is four?" After the teacher stopped laughing, she answered, "What I taught them was, two plus two, THE SUM OF WHICH, is four."

8. One day the first grade teacher was reading the story of "Chicken Little" to her class. She came to the part of the story where Chicken Little tried to warn the farmer. She read, .... "and so Chicken Little went up to the farmer and said, "The sky is falling, the sky is falling!" The teacher paused then asked the class, "And what do you think that farmer said?" One little girl raised her hand and said, "I think he said: 'Holy Shit! A talking chicken!" The teacher was unable to teach for the next 10 minutes.

9. A certain little girl, when asked her name, would reply, "I'm Mr. Sugarbrown's daughter." Her mother told her this was wrong, she must say, "I'm Jane Sugarbrown." The Vicar spoke to her in Sunday School, and said, "Aren't you Mr. Sugarbrown's daughter?" She replied, "I thought I was, but mother says I'm not."

10. A little girl asked her mother, "Can I go outside and play with the boys?" Her mother replied, "No, you can't play with the boys, they're too rough." The little girl thought about it for a few moments and asked, "If I can find a smooth one, can I play with him?"

11. A little girl goes to the barber shop with her father. She stands next to the barber's chair, while her dad gets his hair cut, eating a snack cake. The barber says to her, "Sweetheart, you're gonna get hair on your Twinkie." She says, "Yes, I know, and I'm gonna get boobs too."
~~~~~~~~


Found this over at Un-Reconstructed Medic

Friday, March 25, 2005

Let's Lighten Up Already!


What Flavour Are You? Tomato is what I taste like.Tomato is what I taste like.


I taste like nothing, except a tomato. I'm sometimes sweet and sometimes tart; sometimes juicy, sometimes crisp. The roles of a tomato are many and varied. I am an exception to all the rules. If I wasn't a tomato, I'd be BREAD
What Flavour Are You?

~~~~~~~~


Isn't that the coolest? I'm tomato, and I could be bread, best of all I love tomato sandwiches!

Well, another week has passed. The weekend is upon us. It's time to relax, maybe work in the yard a bit, and of course BLOGsurf! So, as Joe says, get out your surfboard and ride those internet waves!
Ya'll have a good one!

ps: Dawn, I've been trying for two days now to visit you but for some reason my browser just won't open up your page. I haven't forgotten you. I just can't get in!

Thursday, March 24, 2005

Let His Will Be Done

I tried to avoid posting anything about Terri Schiavo and her tragic story here. Primarily because it has very deep and personal parallels for me. So much so that even trying to explain my position and the reasons behind it brings me to tears. Still, I find that I must say something. Maybe because so many others are commenting and it's difficult for me not to express my opinion.

I have spoken of my Mother's family before. My Mother had five sisters. Three of whom I was very close. Aunt Lois was the oldest sister, she died of breast cancer in the early 80's. Aunt Faye is the sister next to my Mom, she still lives in Anniston. I haven't seen her in years but she holds a special place in my heart. Aunt Ruby was the youngest child and sister. Aunt Ruby was a beauty (in a Susan Hayward kind of way). She was smart, funny, and the sweetest woman you'd ever want to know. Even when she broke ranks with the other sisters and married a damn yankee she was still the apple of everyone's eye. They lived up north so we didn't get to see much of her but when we did it was a BIG family reunion. Ruby was our family's princess. In Febuary of 1989 we got a call from her oldest son,that she had been in a bad car accident and the family needed to come right away. By the time my Mom, Grandmother and other aunts arrived, she was out of surgery, in a coma and on a respirator. They were all in shock. My Mother said she looked so normal. Except for a few cuts and brusies. The next morning they were all there when the doctor made his rounds. Mawmaw and the aunts had plenty of questions. Would she recover? If she did would she ever be normal? The doctor said, the prognosis wasn't good. It was unlikely she would ever come out of the coma, and if she did she would most likely be a vegetable . Still, (his words) miracles do happen and it was too soon to give up hope. Exhausted they all left, went to a nearby hotel to get some rest. Later that afternoon, Aunt Faye called the hospital to get an update and was told "we can't give that information out over the phone". Fearing the worst they quickly dressed and rushed to the hospital. To their shock and grief they were told she had passed. As they were leaving one of the nurses followed them to the elevator and told them, Ruby had not passed, her husband had ordered her respirator disconnected. As her husband he and he alone had that right. Without so much as talking to her family or their sons, he had her taken off life support.
Later after her funeral her sons told them what has transpired. They (the boys) had been taking turns sitting with her talking to her, when the doctor had come by to check on her, their Dad had called him aside. They appeared to be arguing, the doctor shaking his head, but their Dad was standing his ground. Finally they heard him say, "I am her husband and it's MY decision!" The doctor shook his head and walked away. A few minutes later the nurses came over to her bed and began the process of disconnecting her from her life support. When they boys objected their Dad told them, "Look she's dead. It's over. I'm not having her be some vegtable." Then he walked out. Leaving her devastated sons and family to deal with his decision.
We will never know what kind of recovery she might have made. We do know for certain that as a nurse Ruby had seen this situation many times and more than once she had said "don't ever let anyone disconnect me unless there is no hope of a recovery". Yes, her husband said different. What else would he say? Why would he do such a thing? Was it true grief? Was it because he didn't want to see his beautiful Ruby reduced to something much less than the living breathing woman he loved? Or was it the huge insurance policy he had on her. Or the lawsuit he later won because the accident had involved a truck for a major trucking company? Of course we can't know what was on his mind that day.
What I do know is that her family would have loved to have had one, five, ten or even fifteen more years in which to love and care for the Ruby we loved. Even if she had become a vegetable. And I'd fight you to the death today if you tried to make me starve her. You can bet I would. If that makes me wrong. Then I don't want to be right.

Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Things I Have Learned


I've learned ...
That you cannot make someone love you.
All you can do is be someone who can be loved ...
The rest is up to them.

I've learned ...
That it's not what you have in your life ...
But who you have in your life that counts.

I've learned ...
That you can get by on charm
For about fifteen minutes ...
After that, you'd better know something.

I've learned ...
That you shouldn't compare yourself
To the best others can do ...
But to the best you can do.

I've learned ...
That it's not what happens
To people that's important ...
It's what they do about it.

I've learned ...
That you can do something in an instant ...
That will give you heartache for life.

I've learned ...
That no matter how thin you slice it ...
There are always two sides.

I've learned ...
That it's taking me a long time ...
To become the person I want to be.

I've learned ...
That it's a lot easier to react ...
Than it is to think.

I've learned ...
That you should always leave loved ones
With loving words ...
It may be the last time you see them.

I've learned ...
That you can keep going
Long after you think you can't.

I've learned ...
That we are responsible for what we do ...
No matter how we feel.

I've learned ...
That either you control your attitude ...
Or it controls you.

I've learned ...
That no matter how much I care ...
Some people just don't care back.

I've learned ...
That it takes years to build up trust ...
And only seconds to destroy it.

I've learned ...
That regardless of how hot and steamy
A relationship is at first ...
The passion fades and there had better
Be something else to take its place.

I've learned ...
That true friendship continues to grow,
Even over the longest distance ...
Same goes for true love.
~~~~~~~~~~


I've seen many variations of this all over the web, but this one seems to some up most of what I've learned throughout my life. Those last lines are especially for two wonderful people who are just beginning the journey of discovery with each other.

Tuesday, March 22, 2005

Spring Has Sprung

I bid you adieu my sweet Winter.
Today was one of those days that lead me to believe, my beloved, but shortlived winter is finally over. I know I will miss her. With her cold fingers carressing my body as I snuggle under my down filled covers. I know in all likelihood, there will be no more days of grey cloud filled skies, with a cold breeze blowing through the air. Winter has finally "surrendered to temperamental Spring"*. At least here in Podunt.
I believe *Mamamontezz (forgive me but I don't remember how or where I found her blog, and cannot provide a link for her at this time) said it best, "The sun will soon touch places that have not felt it’s warmth in months, the breezes will tease and toy with hair too long covered by hats and scarves, and the soul will be serenaded by the few brave songbirds which have ventured north well ahead of their flocks. Even the most jaded of observers cannot deny the green sprouts and tender buds emerging from their wintry graves.

It will not be long before the golf courses are emerald again, or the parks a riot of color. Soon, too, the pools will be open and screams and squeals will fill the air as children splash and play under the endless sky. Families will set out feasts in open shelters, and lovers will steal away for moments of sensual bliss on blankets of soft, green grass."


Our young here in Podunt are on Spring Break. Oh the thrill. There are trips to the beach being planned with great anticipation. When I foolishly suggested my son might need a new swimsuit, he guffawed and looked at me as if I'd lost my mind. "I've been to the beach at least 100 times in the past few years," he said "and I've probably actually seen the beach maybe twice." It seems nobody goes to the beach to swim. Perish the thought. They go to cruise the stip. Ahh yes, it seems somewhere in the recesses of my middle-aged mind I recall the strip. A stretch of beach road about 5 miles long, that hosts every fast food joint in the known world,and is liberally littered with hotels, motels,convenience stores, tattoo and piercing parlors. Yes, cruising the stip is a rite of Spring [Break].
For me this hearlds the coming of a long, hot suffering summer. I wonder if one can install a cold tub on one's patio? Perhaps I should consider a trip way down south. Michelle, would you mind a winter visitor? Or two?

Sunday, March 20, 2005

The Purpose Driven Life

I briefly mentioned this book a few days ago in my post about the wonderfully amazing women I have come to know via my virtual community. Since then I've been doing a bit of reading. You can find the first seven chapters online, here . There's been much discussion of this book in the media of late. Everyone is hearlding it's message. The book was already a bestseller. In fact the best of bestsellers. If you combined the top three books currently on the list, they still haven't sold as many copies as this one. Clearly Rick Warren has found what was lacking in the lives of many and is speaking to their hearts and souls. He is offering them spiritual nourishment in a time when it is sorely needed.
I believe a large part of that is because religion and the Bible (or the Koran/Alcoran) have become mired down in the battlefields of politics. There are sectors of our society who have decided to use the Judo-Christian/Islam faiths as their means of controlling society. They quote the Bible/Koran/Alcoran, (often out of context) and use it to set moral standards as they believe they should be. Instead of spreading love, faith, and hope, they are using them to exclude and damn anyone who doesn't fit into their narrow minded world of values.
Rick Warren's book offers us a reminder of what not just Christianity, but most faiths are suppose to be about. Sevrice. To God and to our fellow man. Not to judge but to serve, and to love. To love one another as we would love ourselves. To do unto others as we would have them do unto us. It is only through love and service unto God and our fellow man can we find the peace we seek. Only through the purpose driven life .
Look at those around us. Those who are sickest. Who face almost insurmountable obstacle's. They do so with such aplomb, such calm in the midst of the storms of their lives. Their faith sustaining them. Do you see them whinning or complaining? No. Instead they are busy, giving, loving, reaching out. Making the most of what they have.
On the other hand we see those who have it all. Home, family, health, a good income, and what are they doing? Whinning because everything is not perfect. They fall apart when people don't do as they want. When they don't get the attention they need and desire. When the world doesn't worship at their feet. When children disobey, or husbands/wives don't pay attention. When neighbors get a better car. Or their co-worker gets a raise (that of course SHOULD have been given to them). They spend so much time being petty and selfish they miss out on what is truly important in life.
There are those who wear the cloak of Christianity/Muslim but their actions and words deny that claim. They set themselves up as judge and jury over what is right and moral, hijacking the Bible/Koran/Alcoran to support their assertions. Failing to realize in their zeal that the Bible/Koran teaches love and tolerance, not hate,and judgement. That only GOD has the right to judge. Did Jesus not say in Matthew 7:1-5 "Judge not, and ye shall not be judged. For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again. And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye,but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?"
Maybe this is why so many are reaching out for this book. Because we are so weary of the angst, the bitterness, the lonliness that is seeping into our lives. We turn away from religion because it leaves a bitter taste in our hearts and souls. We seek fulfillment, peace, and the willingness of others to love one another. Our books of faith have been soiled, so we turn to something new. Something that teaches us not to judge and condem, but to give unto others,to love and to serve.
What greater joy can there be than to know you have brought a smile to the face and heart of someone in their hour of need? Surely not even being right can triumph that.

Saturday, March 19, 2005

Blogging

Recently someone ask me "What is a blog and why do you keep one?"
After getting past the initial shock that there could be anyone who doesn't know what a blog is, I gave them the standard simple answer. I blog because I enjoy it and I can. That's not really the answer.
Blogging is my connection to the world. It has connected me to some of the most amazing people in the world. One might even call it my virtual community. A community where I am a valued citizen. Where my opinion matters. Where my feelings are validated. It provides me with an outlet for my frustration, my joy and my sadness.
My political blog enables, nay encourages me to stay informed. I have access to multiple opinions on both sides of the fence. When an issue is one I embrace with passion and fire, I can state my feelings there with little worry or concern that I may offend someone. It is there that my intellect, and my strength of conviction is challenged. I don't have a large number of visitors but of those who visit, several are of much different opinions than I. We enjoy debating the issues. We respect each other's point of view while maintaining our own.

This blog is what I think of as my morning coffee crowd. We're friends who meet and chat over anything and everything. We talk about our families, our friends, ourselves. We work through our ups and downs (with a little help from our friends). Odds are we may never meet face to face. That doesn't make any of you any less important in my life. Everyday, I can't wait to get to blogging. I want to know what's happening with David, Brenda, Sally, Ellen, Joe (both Joe's), Mary Lou and all the rest. I happily spend hours getting caught up with each of you. What ever did I do before I found you here in the wonderful world of blogs?
I read somewhere that blogging is often akin to yelling in the forest . With so many blogs out there how can one hope that their tiny voice will be heard? Yet heard we are. Somehow, most of us manage to find a group of people who identify with us and who actually care about what we say and how we feel. It may be a large forest but there are small islands of trees where the flowers bloom, the sun shines, furry little animals and big hulking animals come together to share their lives. Of course there are rainy days, but we take care of each other. We provide a shelter from the storm. Our Critter Chick watches over us, much the way Mother Nature watches over those in her forest.
This is WHY I blog.

Thursday, March 17, 2005

Amazing People

In her post for today Ellen mentioned the book "The Purpose Driven Life" by Rick Warren. Interestingly I had just seen the same book profiled last night on MSNBC. They were doing a piece on Ashley Smith and how she had been able to talk to Brian Nichols and convince him to give himself up without futher harming anyone else. There are a good many folks out there who believe what happened in that apartment during those long frightening hours, was as close to a miracle as you can get. Here was a man who'd already killed four people, and probably would have killed more before either killing himself or being killed by police.
One can only imagine the courage and strength it took for this young woman to stand her ground and talk this man off the path he had set himself upon. At some point Brian Nichols had given up hope. We may never know exactly what he was thinking but it is certain he had no qualms about killing four innocent people. "Ashley Smith is a national hero--a brave, resourceful single mother who has suffered in her life, and who at a series of pivotal moments did the right thing and the kind thing and helped a killer end a killing spree."
When I first heard about this brave young woman, a single mother to a little girl, I immediately thought of our own Faith . I know how she stuggles on a daily basis to keep her life on an even keel. To be the best parent she can to her child, the best daughter she can to her Mother, and the best person she can for all those who love her. Then my thoughts went to Dawn and her stuggles with not only her own health but that of her husband and her father. Of course one can't think of strong women facing almost insurmountable stuggles without thinking of sweet precious Ellen. Ellen, who even as she battles her own health crisis, finds the time and compassion to reach out to others. (Thank you Ellen for that wonderful package, I received it just today!). Then there's Mary Lou . I wonder if she knows how many times those sweet little cards she's sent my way have been just the pick me up I've needed. When it comes to strong, brave women, Brenda would have to be at the top of the list. There is simply no way I could do what that lady does on a daily basis.
Ashley Smith is more than just a hero, she is a prime example of every woman who has stepped up to the plate and met life's challenges with strength, faith, and courage. Women like the ones I've mentioned, women like Phyllis , and CJ , and Barb . Of course I'd be remiss if I did not mention Leslie , who's ability to let go of the past, forgive and look to the future has inspired me on more than one occasion. In fact all the ladies on my blogroll( Desiree,Brook, Tiffany,Traci,Kim, Becky, Canadian Kim, Michelle,Cassie, Sally,Otto,Chenoah,Vegas(what is your real name child?),TW,KB,& Jaye, whew, hopefully I didn't miss anyone) are worthy of mention. For they all exhibit the same character and bravery that the world is admiring in Ms Smith today. I can say in all honesty, ladies YOU are my hero's!
" It might have appeared to go unnoticed,
but I've got it all here in my heart....
I can fly higher than an eagle,
so high against the sky,
Thank you, thank you, thank God for you,
the wind beneath my wings. "

Wednesday, March 16, 2005

Canadian Mist

Canadian Mist is one of my favorite liquors. It ranks right up there with Southern Comfort and Jack Daniels.
Speaking of Candian's...

From the province where drunk driving is considered a sport, comes this true story.

Recently a routine police patrol parked outside a Lethbridge, Alberta bar. After last call the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so intoxicated that he could barely walk. The man stumbled around the street for a few minutes, with the officer quietly observing. After what seemed an eternity and trying his keys on five vehicles, the man managed to find his car which he fell into. He was there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off.

Finally he started the car, switched the wipers on and off (it was a fine dry night) flicked the blinkers on, then off, honked the horn and then switched on the lights. He moved the vehicle forward a few inches, reversed a little and then remained still for a few more minutes as more vehicles left.

At last he pulled out of the parking lot and started to drive slowly down the road. The police officer, having patiently waited all this time, now started up the patrol car, put on the flashing lights, promptly pulled the man over and carried out a breathalyzer test.

To his amazement the breathalyzer indicated no evidence of the man having consumed any alcohol at all! Dumbfounded, the officer said, "I'll have to ask you to accompany me to the police station. This breathalyzer equipment must be broken." "I doubt it", said the truly proud Canadian,

"Tonight I'm the Designated Decoy."
~~~~~~~


You gotta love those Candians! I know I do!!

Tuesday, March 15, 2005

Father Loose Lips

A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak. After mass he asked the monsignor how he had done. The monsignor replied, "When I am worried about getting nervous on the pulpit, I put a glass of vodka next to the water glass. If I start to get nervous, I take a sip."
So the next Sunday he took the monsignor's advice. At the beginning of the sermon, he got nervous and took a drink, or two. He proceeded to talk up a storm. Upon return to his office after mass, he found the following note on his door:
1. Sip the Vodka, don't gulp.
2. There are 10 commandments, not 12.
3. There are 12 disciples, not 10.
4. Jesus was consecrated, not constipated.
5. Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not bet his ass.
6. We do not refer to Jesus Christ as the late J.C.
7. The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are not referred to as Daddy, Junior, and the Spook.
8. David slew Goliath, he did not kick the shit out of him.
9. When David was hit by a rock and knocked off his donkey,
don't say he was stoned off his ass.
10. We do not refer to the cross as the Big T!
11. When Jesus broke the bread at the Last Supper he said, "Take this and eat it, for it is my body", he did not say, "Eat me."
12. The Virgin Mary is not referred to as the, "Mary with the Cherry".
13. The recommended grace before a meal is not: "Rub-A-dub-dub, thanks for the grub, yeah God". and finally...
14. Next Sunday there will be a taffy-pulling contest at St.Peter's, not a peter-pulling contest at St. Taffy's
~~~~~


Who says that Catholics can't laugh at themselves?

Thanks to my right-wingnut friend Delftsman3 , for this bit of religious humor.

Monday, March 14, 2005

Monday Musings

The Greatest Man I Ever Knew

I know I have posted this before, but Joe's (both Joe's) talking about his Grandpa has made me want to share this with those of you who may not have read it in the past.
I've been thinking about my PawPaw a lot lately. All night last night, and all day today I have been thinking about him. I searched the remote corners of mind, making sure I would find just the right words to describe this giant of a man. Not that he was a big man, he wasn't, not in stature anyway. To see him on the street you would have seen an ordinary Southern gentleman of his time. He wore the required straw hat, and had his ever present walking cane. He was thin and about average in height. He worked hard most of his life, in the fields. Picking cotton, peas, corn, or whatever the crop was at the time. He and my Grandmother had 9 children, 8 of which they raised to adulthood.
I can remember hearing my Mother and her sisters talk about picking cotton till they were too tired to eat supper. Pawpaw was a hard worker. Mawmaw was on the lazy side, and many times the older girls had to get up in the mornings and fix breakfast before going out to the fields (or to school in the winter). Of course looking back, I would render a guess that what they thought was laziness was probably exhaustion. The woman had NINE children, I can't imagine having that many little ones.

By the time I came into their lives, they had moved from the country into town. Pawpaw ran a boarding house for a man from down around Talladega. He took his "super" responsibilities very seriously. When a tenant had a problem , he'd gather up his tools , which he carried in this long wooden box with a handle on it, and off he'd go.. Pawpaw could fix anything. From a stopped up toilet, to an old gas stove that wouldn't light. He was not only as jack of all trades he was a Master of all trades. At least to me anyway. The thing that he was best at fixing was a little girls skinned knees or or broken dolls. My earliest memories of life are of sitting on Pawpaw's lap, with him brushing my hair with one of those round brushes that old men used to have handy. I can remember him saying what beautiful silky hair I had. He called me his precious angel.
Now this might not sound like anything out of the ordinary, unless you know the rest of the story. You see, I was born in the late 50's. To an unwed Mother. My Mother had married young, borne two childern, then divorced. I guess she was what would have been called a bit of a 'hussy' in those days. After her divorce she just 'went wild' as Pawpaw would say. She hooked up with a fella who owned a used car lot and they had a 'rounder of a time'. Until my Mother came up pregnant. The problem was this fella already had a wife and 3 children. And he wasn't going to be leaving her, since HER family had all the money. My Mother's 'situation' had to have been a 'great embarrassment' to my grandparents. Pawpaw was a well known and respected gentleman around town, and it could not have been easy for him. It must have taken all the strenght of character he had to swallow his pride and carry on, business as usual. To be honest, I don't think anyone dared to say anything to him. He was a fiercely proud man, with a short temper. My Mother stayed down in Clay county with Mawmaw's sister until after I was born. You would think she would have come back to town with some humility and common sense. Not so. Instead she returned pretty much to the same 'traipsing ways' she'd had before. In back of the big boarding house that Pawpaw ran, was a small cinder block duplex. Each side had two bedrooms, a livingroom and a kitchen. Mama moved into one of those apartments. While she worked Mawmaw and my aunts babysat us. She worked hard all week as a waitress, but on Saturday night she 'hit the honkey tonks'. Mama was a party girl. Much to Pawpaw's disgust. But he never let his disgust and disappointment with my Mother, impact on his love for me.

I can remember following him around while he took care of his 'sponsibilties'. Back in those days little girls were suppose to wear dresses, but Pawpaw said that wasn't going to work for me. I might have been an angel, but I was a tom-boy from the start. He had Mawmaw take some of my brothers old cast off pants, cut them off and hem them for me. Mawmaw said it was 'scandalous'. He'd just look at her and shake his head. I am sure he was thinking , in this family, scandalous is the norm.
In the afternoons we'd sit on the front porch. Him in his rocking chair and me at his feet. Sometimes in the summer time, he gather up his walking stick, take me by the hand and we'd walk down the street to the drug store and get my favorite treat...ice cream sherbet, in a cone. There would always be a great discussion as to what flavor. Orange, was ,mmm,mmm good and pineapple was yummy, but by far my favorite was lemon. It was so creamy and sweet with just a bit of tart. Of course back then I didn't know that. I just knew it was the best. We'd sit out front with the other old men, and I'd have my sherbet while he and his buddies pondered matters of great importance. After I finished, he'd spit clean me (yes, men do it too!). Then we'd make our way back home. Of course Mawmaw would have a fit. "You are going to ruin that child's supper" she'd say. He ignored her protest. At night , I'd get my bath, then he would come out and get me, and we'd go sit on the back porch and he would tell me stories. I'd fall asleep on his lap. I don't know how that wonderful man, with his legs crippled by arthritis carried me, but he did. Every night he'd tuck me in. Is it any wonder that no man has ever been able to compare to him?
We lived in that little apartment until I was about 4 years old. My Mother met her an Army man. She grabbed onto him and hung on for dear life. When she married him, and moved us to North Carolina, it broke my Pawpaw's heart, and mine too. I can still see him sitting on the door step with tears streaming down his face as the car pulled out of the yard.
After that we saw him once or twice a year, at Christmas or durning the summer. The longest trip he ever made was the trip he made to Lakeland , Florida to see us when I was 11. We went to Cyprus Gardens, and he held my hand all that day as we walked around. I know it had to be hard on him, but he did it for me. He thought is was amazing seeing those young women in their swimsuits skiing on the water that way.
In late January of the following year we got the call...."Come home right away." Pawpaw had suffered a stroke and was in a coma. He never woke up. Mama and Mawmaw, didn't want me to go to the hospital, and see him like that, but I persisted. Finally late the day after we got there, my Aunt Faye took me to the hospital. I crawled up on the bed beside him and cried till I had no tears left in me. I lay there until the nurse came in and told my aunt, I'd have to move. He slipped away sometime in the early morning hours of that night. January 31st. My birthday.
I will always believe he held on just long enough for his' precious angel' to come and say "Goodbye".
He was the Greatest Man I ever knew.
I love you Pawpaw.

Sunday, March 13, 2005

Sunday Musings

Murphy's laws
If anything can go wrong, it will
If there is a possibility of several things going wrong, the one that will cause the most damage will be the one to go wrong
If anything just cannot go wrong, it will anyway
If you perceive that there are four possible ways in which something can go wrong, and circumvent these, then a fifth way, unprepared for, will promptly develop
Corollary: It will be impossible to fix the fifth fault, without breaking the fix on one or more of the others
Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something
Nature always sides with the hidden flaw
Corollary: The hidden flaw never stays hidden for long.
Mother nature is a bitch.
Murphy's Law of Thermodynamics
Things get worse under pressure.
The Murphy Philosophy
Smile . . . tomorrow will be worse.
Quantization Revision of Murphy's Laws
Everything goes wrong all at once.
Murphy's Constant
Matter will be damaged in direct proportion to its value
~~~~~~~



When I came across the picture above I knew I had to use it. With the exception of the laptop this could be the very desk where I sit every night as I blog and surf the web. It's almost eerie how much it looks like my house.

Saturday, March 12, 2005

The Chicken & The Road

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

GEORGE W BUSH
We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road.

We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. Our side of the road is the right side of the road and the chicken is either with us or against us. There is no middle ground for any chicken.

COLIN POWELL
Now, to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.

DONALD RUMSFELD
I have known about the chicken crossing the road for several months. I was investigating why the chicken moved but didn't feel it was necessary to alert anyone.

HANS BLIX
We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

JOHN KERRY
Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road I am now against it!

RALPH NADER
The chicken's habitat on the other side of the road had been polluted by unchecked industrial greed. The chicken did not reach the unspoiled habitat on the other side of the road because it was crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.

RUSH LIMBAUGH
I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but I'll bet it was getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet that somebody out there is already forming a support group to help chickens with crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much more of this can real Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid for by their tax dollars. And when I say tax dollars, I'm talking about your money, money the government took from you to build road for chickens to cross.

MARTHA STEWART
No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any inside information.

DR SEUSS
Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY
To die in the rain. Alone.

GRANDPA
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS
Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heartwarming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its life long dream of crossing the road.

JOHN LENNON
Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together -- in peace.

ARISTOTLE
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

KARL MARX
It was a historic inevitability.

CAPTAIN KIRK
To boldly go where no chicken has ever gone before.

SIGMOND FREUD
The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

BILL GATES
I have just witnessed eChicken2005, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook... and Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken.

ALBERT EINSTEIN
Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

BILL CLINTON
I did NOT cross the road with that chicken. What is your definition of crossing the road?
JACQUES CHIRAC
We will veto any resolution regarding non-compliance of the chicken whether is has or has not crossed the road!
MOHAMMED ALDOURI (Iraq ambassador)
The chicken did not cross the road. This is a complete fabrication. We don't even have a chicken.
SADDAM HUSSEIN
This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on the chicken and its family.
AL GORE
I invented the chicken. I invented the road. Therefore, the chicken crossing the road represented the application of these two different functions of government in a new, reinvented way designed to bring greater services to the American people.
PAT BUCHANAN
T o steal a job from a decent, hard-working American.
JERRY FALWELL
Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't you people see the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the "other side." That's what they call it -- the other side. Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like "the other side.
MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.
COLONEL SANDERS
Did I miss one?

Thursday, March 10, 2005

If It's Thursday This Must Be Podunt


Funerals suck. How people can go from weeping and wailing one minute to smiling and cracking jokes the next is beyond me. I guess when I get in a mood I tend to stay there. At least for while anyway. This predilection put me at odds with the majority of folks attending my brother-in-laws funeral and wake. There were so many people, so many faces. So many I had no recognition of. Clearly he was a man who touched many lives. He was a very GOOD man. Of that there is no doubt. If your a Christian , then you know they are having one heck of a big celebration in heaven this week, for one of God's loyal soldiers has returned home.

I am tired. I mean bone-weary, dead in my tracks tired. I did get a bit of sleep last night but it was not of the restful variety. I kept having these crazy dreams of being in a casket, seeing people walk by me, weeping, and wailing. All the time I was sreaming out to them, "I'm not DEAD!" "Can't you see, I'm alive?" Then would come that inevitable time when they'd close the lid and I'd try to stop them but my arms and legs wouldn't work. I could feel the coffin being moved around and hear people talking but I couldn't make them hear me. This people is why nightmares are called nightmares! It is also why I will NOT be one of those being buried. My family has very strict insturctions. I am to be cremated and my ashes scattered along the beaches of the Emerald Coast. Yes, I know that is illegal, but my children are resourseful, they'll figure out a way! Anyway(ooh Piggy's favorite word), as you can see there was no rest for this weary soul.

Now, I have one day to rest up before Zach arrives for the weekend. I do so love that child, but mercy me he is a handful . I don't know how Brenda does it. If I had to raise and care for a child at this point on my life, they'd be spreading those aforementioned ashes a lot sooner rather than later. In a perfect world there are simply somethings a woman shouldn't have to do after the age of 45. Of course no one promised me a perfect world did they? Then there's the possibility/probability that I'm a whuss. Not that anyone is going to actually tell me that. Right?

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

A Long Days Journey into Night

It's been a long, hard day. Tomorrow promises to be much the same. I have little of value to share tonight, so I'll just pop up a quiz I took a few days ago.
******


Genuis


You scored 99% Beginner, 96% Intermediate, 97% Advanced, and 96% Expert!

You have an extremely good understanding of beginner, intermediate, and advanced level commonly confused English words, getting at least 95% of each of these three levels' questions correct. This is an exceptional score. Remember, these are commonly confused English words, which means most people don't use them properly. You got an extremely good score.

Compared with those of your gender and in your age group:
You scored higher than 95 % on the beginner
You scored higher than 96% on the Intermediate
You scored higher than 97% on the Advanced
You scored higher than 96% on the Expert

Thank you so much for taking my test. I hope you enjoyed it!



The Commonly Confused Words Test written by shortredhead78 on Ok Cupid
~~~~~~~


ps: Thanks to all of you for your kind words and prayers.

Monday, March 07, 2005

Monday Lamintation

The call came at 4 AM this morning. The hubs brother was gone.
He'd been taken by ambulance to the hospital in Dothan yesterday morning. His kidneys were failing as was his liver. By the time we got there he was in and out of consciousness, bearly recognizing anyone. I don't think I've ever seen a human so yellow. He was in a great deal of pain. Finally the doctors gave him morphine to ease him as much as possible. Exhausted we came home around midnight to try and get a little rest. It was for naught. We planned on going back early this morning. My sister-in-law (the older brother's wife) was with him, as was his minister. His wife had gone home like us, in hopes of getting a shower, a change of clothes, and maybe a short nap. I know it will weigh heavily on her and Robert that they were not there with him at the end.
Kenneth was 61 years old. He and Wanda (she's Wanda #1, I'm Wanda #2) had been married since they were in their early 20's. They never had children, but weren't bitter about it. They traveled quite abit to Tennessee. He loved the mountains. He'd been battling congestive heart disease for over a year and had only recently been diagnosed with liver cancer. He knew his time was near and seemed to accept it with the peace of mind of a man who had his affairs in order and his soul firmly placed in God's hands. He leaves behind his wife,three brothers, two older and one younger, four nieces and six nephews. He was a good Christian man, active in his church. A man who loved life and lived it to it's fullest. He will be grievously missed.
Godspeed Kenneth

Sunday, March 06, 2005

I'm A Traveling (Wo)Man

Well, I used to be. Not so much anymore. I still love to travel, just can't afford to do too much of it these days. Not with the ever rising cost of gasoline. I could almost say I've been every where man ..."

Bold the states you've been to, underline the states you've lived in and italicize the state you're in now...

Alabama / Alaska / Arizona / Arkansas / California / Colorado / Connecticut / Delaware / Florida / Georgia / Hawaii / Idaho / Illinois / Indiana / Iowa / Kansas / Kentucky / Louisiana / Maine / Maryland / Massachusetts / Michigan / Minnesota / Mississippi / Missouri / Montana / Nebraska / Nevada / New Hampshire / New Jersey / New Mexico / New York / North Carolina / North Dakota / Ohio / Oklahoma / Oregon / Pennsylvania / Rhode Island / South Carolina / South Dakota / Tennessee / Texas / Utah / Vermont / Virginia / Washington / West Virginia / Wisconsin / Wyoming / Washington D.C /.

I've also lived in France, Germany, Spain, Italy, and Greece. I've traveled to or through, Canada, Austria, Switzerland, Czechoslovakia, Sweden, Norway, Portugal,and England.
I hope to one day visit South Africa and Japan.

So, where have YOU been?

Go HERE to have a form generate the HTML for you.

Saturday, March 05, 2005

Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep
NOT!
I haven't slept in days. My eyes feel like they are full of sand and weigh a ton. My brain has long passed the stage where everything turns to mush. I'm to the point where I avoid operating heavy machinery if at all possible. Of course when you feel as bad as I do, even a Jeep Grand Cherokee can seem like heavy machinery. In fact this keyboard is starting to weigh fairly heavily on my mind.
Last night at midnight (the start of yet another sleepless day) I was sitting (more like slumping) here at my desk sipping a cup of decaffeinated coffee. When I spied this little package of chocolates left over from Valentines Day. So, I decided I'd have me a few. Then I get into this discussion with myself, "does chocolate have caffeine in it?" " No, of course not you silly goose." "Oh bull how would you know you silly old hag?" It went back and forth like that(with these two tiny little me's, one on each shoulder) for about five minutes. I finally gave into temptation and had one. Then another, then another, and another, and, well you get the idea. I was on the verge of a psedo-diabetic seizure before I ran out of chocolates. Well, damn, they were GOOD. Besides should I succumb to said seizure surely I will fall to the floor and pass out. At this point sleep is sleep. Even an over-indulged-in-chocolate induced coma would be near bliss.

Insomnia is a terrible thing. It's a curse. Not some clever curse cast about by those exquisite young ladies of Charmed fame, either, it's a curse of life rendering proportions. One can slowly begin to identify with the undead. I find myself wandering aimlessly, unthinking, staring straight ahead with unseeing eyes, not registering conversation, irritable, my temper flaring at the slightest thing, becoming paranoid, suspicious of everyone, wanting to be alone. That's the second part of insomnia's curse , it makes you want to be alone, but when you are alone it plays on your insecurities. "Nobody likes you. You're pathetic," it whispers. So you start to worry about these things too. And worrying about them keeps you awake at night. It's no joke. Insomnia is a curse.
Here is a list of things that have been suggested that might help one get to sleep.

1. Get pissy durnk every night. While this certainly has the plus side of - well - getting you pissy drunk every night, we all know we can do stupid things when we're drunk. Besides getting drunk probably wouldn't work for me because I'll just pass out for a couple of hours then wake up feeling like crap - a feeling that continues for all of the next day. By the way, when your an insomniac, the next day you have to get through is a LOT longer than for ordinary folks..

2. Sleeping tablets. Well, I am a big fan of medication. Especailly when it's self-medicating. But what if I tried them and they worked where would that lead - addiction? Every time I couldn't sleep (which is more often than not) I'd go running for those little magic pills. I have a very addictive personality. Just remember the chocolate fiasco.

3. Cut out caffeine before going to bed. Been there, done that (well unless there's caffeine in chocolate, and we won't go there). Still not sleeping.

4. Hitting myself over the head with a stick. I suspect if I get any more bitchy from the lack of sleep I'll be getting dangerously close to this one. Only it won't be ME weilding the aforementioned stick.
So far nothings worked. I remain heavy lidded, grossly grouchy, and dangerously delusional.
[editors note: Portions of the above rant may have been shamelessly stolen from other sources, which at the moment I cannot for the life of me remember and therefore cannot give due credit. Live with it.]

Thursday, March 03, 2005

A Long Day

I don't feel up to going into today's events, lets just say it's been a long exhausting day. One I hope to never repeat.
I know it's a bit soon for a new blogskin, but the other one just didn't feel right to me. I'm not sure how I feel about this one either. I think I just needed to change something. To exert some small amount of control, in what has seemed like a day spiraling out of control.
In an attempt to cheer myself up, I thought I'd share this little poem that was sent to me ages ago by a friend who'd just been in for a mamagram. I'm sure any woman who's ever had one can identify with her pain.
~~~~~

The Boob Poem

For years and years they told me,
Be careful of your breasts.
Don't ever squeeze or bruise them,
And give them monthly tests.

So I heeded all their warnings,
And protected them by law.
Guarded them very carefully.
And I always wore my bra.

After 30 years of astute care,
My gyno, Dr. Pruitt,
Said I should get a mammogram.
" O.K." I said, "let's do it."

" Stand up here real close" she said,
{She got my boob in line},
"And tell me when it hurts," she said,
"Ah yes! Right there, that's fine."

She stepped upon a pedal,
I could not believe my eyes!
A plastic plate came slamming down,
My hooter's in a vise!

My skin was stretched and mangled,
From underneath my chin.
My poor boob was being squashed,
To Swedish Pancake thin.

Excruciating pain I felt,
Within it's vise-like grip.
A prisoner in this vicious thing,
My poor defenseless tit!

"Take a deep breath," she said to me,
Who does she think she's kidding?
My chest is mashed in her machine,
And woozy I am getting.

"There that's good," I heard her say,
{The room was slowly swaying.}
"Now, let's have a go at the other one."
Have mercy, I was praying.

It squeezes me from both up and down,
It squeezed me from both sides.
I'll bet SHE'S never had this done
To her tender little hide.

Next time that they make me do this,
I will request a blindfold.
I have no wish to see again,
My knockers getting steamrolled.

If I had no problem when I came in,
I surely have one now.
If there had been a cyst in there,
It would have gone "ker-pow!"

This machine was created by a man,
Of this I have no doubt.
I'd like to stick his balls in there,
And see how THEY come out!

~~~~~~~~~

Thoughts for Thursday

I want to thank all of you for your kind words, thoughts and prayers.
Donna's funeral will be tomorrow afternoon. I don't know if I will go or not. There will be so many people there I'm sure I won't be missed. Christen and Kevin's funerals were earlier this week. I know this has been especially hard on the students and teachers at our high school. Both Kevin and Christen were students there. Christen, a senior and Kevin a freshman. Most of the students had Ms Gallion as their music teacher at one time or another. Thankfully most everyone is trying to be supportive and there's not been any pointing of fingers or accusations of fault. I understand that counselors are being provided for the kids at school. I'm sure the churches are offering their support to anyone who needs it as well.
Our little weekly newspaper came out late last night and of course there were pictures. As I looked at them I am amazed that anyone could have survived. The entire front of Kevins car, motor and all was found about 50 feet from the rest of the car. State troopers said neither Kevin or Christen were wearing seat belts. Who knows if it would have saved their lives or not. I believe that God has a set time for all of us to go and when that time comes nothing will stand in his way.
As time goes by everyone will slip back into their normal routines and life will go on. Yet it's for certain that these three wonderful people won't be forgotten. Hopefully every teenager who knew them will stop and think before they press too hard that gas pedal. Hopefully we'll all be a little more cautious and alert. Most of all I hope that everyone who drives a bit too fast, or who's tempted to let their attention wander while driving, will stop and think, it's not just your life your endangering when you are careless. Even one mistake can extract a very high price.

Tuesday, March 01, 2005

Blogger Sucks

Just a short post here to let all of you who use Blogger for you comments know that Blogger is being all pissy and I can't even get them to let me post a comment this afternoon. I'll probably be lucky to even get this to post. See ya'll on the flip side!
~~~~~~~




update:: Well, here it is March already! Time for a new blogskin. (The one before is by far my favorite so you may be seeing it again.) For now I thought maybe we could all use a little cherry, spring-like atmosphere. Because if there's one thing that's for certain, life goes on.




An Audience of One
A Touch Of Heaven
Always Victoria
Bacon and Eh's
Boydcreek
Canuckville
CassieB!!
Causin a Kimmotion!
Chocolate Starfish
Critter Chick
Cul-de-Sac
CandyTufft
Defiance Dolls
Emptying My Head
4EverDawn
Joe Cool
Life After Nexcom
Life on Whidbey
Lumbering Soul
Mind Diversion
My Insanity
Out in the Open
Otto
Southern Secrets
Split Splat (KB)
Talk With Desiree
Txoceanlover's Laments
What's Up Down South
Wind Spirit
Star Wars Fan Films