Thursday, February 01, 2007

Men and puppies...
they are.....
surprisingly alike!
Let's clear one thing up...men are not dogs.
Well... some are.
But most men... they are more like puppies than dogs.
I think of dogs as deliberate. When dogs are "bad," they behave that way knowingly.... in order to get away with something. Puppies do not. Puppies, most often, don't really know any better.
For instance,
-Puppies love puppy chow. If you feed a puppy, it will follow you around and wag it's tail. It will behave better and may even do a few tricks in order to get a "treat."
Men love a good meal and men love "treats" too. Feed a man (with good food, great sex, lots of affection, and love) and he will likely stick around and try to convince you to give him more.
-Puppies are loyal, but to a point. A puppy might jump on you, lick your face and pay a lot of attention to you until someone else comes around and starts throwing a ball or a bone for it to fetch. Puppies are easily distracted.
Men.... they are easily distracted, too. They want to hang out with you, cuddle with you and talk with you ...... until something distracts them. Like football, their buddies or the Wall Street Journal.
-Puppies don't often respond to your requests when you yell at them. In fact, yelling and talking about how "bad" they were... it makes them less likely to do what you want them to do. They only seem interested in pleasing you when you ignore them or offer positive reinforcement.
Okay so this is a no brainer... what do men respond to? Yelling, criticism or negative talk? No.... men respond to no contact. So, if you are trying to get your point across to a man, don't try to get your point across. Just shut the hell up and spend your time doing more useful things.... like going out with the girls. Eventually, a man will wonder where you are. And just like a puppy, he will do whatever it takes to recapture your attention.
-Puppies take a while to house train. Don't expect a puppy to come into the house knowing not to take a dump there.
Don't expect a man to intuitively know what it is you expect from him and how he might go about meeting those expectations. Men need to hear it from you.... they aren't mind readers. Be specific and try not to nag. If it doesn't happen the first time and if it doesn't happen exactly as you expect..... give him a few more chances and see how it goes.
-The best puppies are those that come from loving homes.
The same holds true for men.... the more a man has been loved by his family, the more likely he will know how to best love you.
-Dogs are considered to be "man's best friend" (probably because they don't have much to say) which leads me to believe that puppies have to be someone's best friend, too.
If trained properly, I think a puppy can be a woman's best friend... do you?
Remember.... there are some puppies that are difficult to tame but might still turn out to be excellent dogs.
There are also some puppies that should be sent directly to the pound....
And then there are the bad, bad puppies... they turn out to be real dogs.... and nobody wants a dog for a boyfriend.....
Feel free to list any more similarities that I may have forgotten...
And remember, guys... it's all in good fun!

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